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Navigating the In-Between Years
I’m not quite sure when it all shifted, but it definitely did. Was it during the summer? Or perhaps it happened quietly last fall? Maybe it was a sudden realization, like a mini Big Bang, where I just missed a key moment. Or was it a slow transformation that snuck up on me until one day—BAM!—the truth was clear: we’re deep in the in-between years.
There were times I honestly thought we’d be stuck in the never-ending loop of baby, toddler, and preschool chaos. I was convinced that parenting would mean an unending cycle of diaper changes and nap times. But now, here we are, with both of my kids in school—one in kindergarten and the other in third grade. They’ve outgrown those distinct childhood phases, and we’ve long moved past the erratic behavior of the newborn and toddler stages. Sure, they still have their “threenager” moments, but they’re becoming rarer. We’re not quite at the whirlwind of adolescence, nor are we at the stage where they’ll soon be leaving the nest. They are in this fascinating space where they feel both big and little at the same time.
These in-between years are interesting. They’re old enough to inquire about things like sex, yet they still hold on to the magic of Santa Claus. We’re no longer bound by strict nap schedules, but they still enjoy being tucked in with their favorite blankets. Instead of t-ball, we’re now at kid-pitch baseball games, where it’s not unusual to see a player tear up on the bench. Our summer was filled with sleepovers and high-dive jumps, but also parades and kiddie pools. We’ve watched everything from “The Hobbit” to “Mickey Mouse Clubhouse.” They can shower on their own, yet I still insist on regular baths since they haven’t quite hit that stage of teenage body odor yet.
There’s something uniquely special about these in-between years. It’s a time when the demands of parenting balance out with the delightful innocence of childhood. My kids need me less urgently, but they still desire my presence in a way that feels more balanced. They don’t call it the sweet spot for nothing!
However, this period is also a bit unsettling. With every new step towards independence, I can sense their childhood gradually slipping away. I’m all too aware of the teenage storm that’s brewing just around the corner. These in-between years are a blend of relief, anxiety, excitement, fear, contentment, and utter confusion.
And it’s not just a transitional phase for my kids; it’s a time of change for me as a mom, too. After nearly a decade of being a stay-at-home parent, my children’s routines have dictated my own. Now that my youngest is in kindergarten, I feel the world opening up in ways that are both thrilling and intimidating.
Some days, this new chapter feels like walking on scorching sand. I tread lightly, making quick decisions about what to do next, anxious that if I don’t act fast, I might miss out on some fleeting opportunity. Other days, it feels like I’m sinking into heavy quicksand, overwhelmed by shifting responsibilities and roles.
But most days, it feels like I’m strolling along a beach where the sand is firm and cool. The tide is unpredictable, and I know things will change soon enough, but for now, the shoreline feels comforting and pleasant.
So today, I’m choosing to focus on the “for now.” Right now, the in-between years are precisely where I want to be.
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Summary
This piece reflects on the complexities and joys of the in-between years of parenting, where children are growing yet still cling to childhood innocence. The author shares personal experiences, emphasizing the blend of independence and the bittersweet realization of impending changes. It captures the essence of navigating this unique phase both for the children and the mother.