5 Ways Childfree Friends Can Keep the Bond Strong with Mommy Pals

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It’s likely that you and your best friend forged a connection during those awkward teenage years, navigating crushes, school dances, and late-night chats. You shared secrets, tried out new make-up looks, and maybe even took your first sip of something questionable together.

Your friendship is filled with memories—like belting out 90s hits in the car or having your favorite goofy photos framed on your bedside table. You’ve been through it all: heartbreaks, job changes, and life’s ups and downs. Your bestie is your anchor, the one who truly understands you.

But then, life takes a turn. One of you becomes a mom, and suddenly, everything shifts. Your friendship is now influenced by nap times and diaper changes. This change can feel overwhelming, but if you both value the connection, there are ways to keep that bond alive.

Here are five tips for childfree friends to maintain their friendship with new mom pals:

1. Celebrate the Baby: When your friend has her baby, make an effort to acknowledge this new chapter. A short visit, a thoughtful gift (hello, snacks or a little bubbly!), or even a heartfelt card can go a long way. If you’re far apart, a sweet package or a heartfelt note is better than just a text. And don’t forget to keep asking about her little one’s milestones, even if you’d rather hear about your own pets instead!
2. Plan Kid-Free Outings: Make a point to schedule time together that doesn’t involve kids. Whether it’s a spa day, brunch, or just coffee, this gives her a chance to escape her responsibilities and reconnect with you. That said, sometimes including the children is unavoidable. Just choose kid-friendly places where they can have fun while you two catch up.
3. Stay Flexible: Life with kids can be unpredictable. Be prepared for plans to change, and don’t take it personally when they do. Your mommy friend is juggling a lot, and while you might be concerned about your own schedule, she’s likely balancing multiple responsibilities. Illnesses and last-minute obligations can throw a wrench in the best-laid plans, so be patient and understanding.
4. Utilize Texting: Long phone calls might not be realistic anymore, so lean into texting as your main form of communication. It’s a quick and easy way to stay in touch and share life updates without needing to carve out large chunks of time.
5. Show Empathy: It’s important to understand that her kids will always come first. Don’t harbor resentment if she can’t always prioritize your friendship. Raising tiny humans is a huge task, and while she should make time for herself, it’s not always easy. We all struggle to balance our needs, and sometimes kids will take precedence over everything else, including a night out with you.

And hey, don’t forget, this isn’t a one-way street! Next week, we’ll dive into how mommy friends can also show love and support towards their childfree pals.

In summary, nurturing a friendship between childfree individuals and new moms requires effort, understanding, and a willingness to adapt. With a little creativity, both sides can find ways to keep their bond strong while navigating the changes that come with parenthood.