The Notable Shift from 35 to 40

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Hey there! So, let’s talk about the differences between being 35 and 40, especially when it comes to motherhood. I found out I was pregnant at 35. As an actress, I felt like 35 was basically the same as being 40, which is often seen as a sort of last chance for many in this industry. I remember sitting outside an audition when I was 20 weeks along, jotting down some thoughts that hinted at my growing maturity.

Here’s what I noted:

1. Motherhood is thrilling and a wild adventure, but it’s not the only journey I’m on. Acting is still a huge part of my life, and I’m just taking a break for a bit.
2. I want my daughter to see me as a working actress. It’s essential for her to understand what auditions are and how I break down scenes. I want her to know that studying a script is part of my job.
3. Being a soon-to-be mom has fueled my motivation. Even if my post-baby successes are small, what matters is that she sees me hustling and going after my dreams.

After writing this, I had a moment of nausea (thanks, pregnancy!). Fast forward, and I experienced the whirlwind of new motherhood—sleepless nights, messy hair, and a love like no other. Work-life balance? Well, maybe someday!

Now, here I am at 40, stepping back into the audition scene. You won’t believe what happened during my five-year hiatus from the industry. While I was gone, I actually improved my craft. I sat in a casting office the other day and watched younger actors chatting nervously, some trying to impress others about their recent gigs, while I just signed in for my slot on a fancy new iPad.

I pulled out my trusty spiral notebook again—yes, I still keep my headshots and resumes in a Trapper Keeper. Here’s what I realized:

1. I feel completely calm before auditions now. I don’t know if that’s because of motherhood, but it feels liberating.
2. I’m not concerned about what others think of me. I know if I’m the right fit for a role, I’ll get it.
3. At 40, I’m happier with my appearance than I was at 35. I think my hair is shinier (okay, maybe that’s just in my head, but who cares!).
4. I’m going to walk in and crush this audition, and if it doesn’t go my way, it won’t be because I didn’t do my best.
5. Oh, and of course, the joys of motherhood—Cheerios, sunblock, and applesauce (my lists cover a lot!).

Five years ago, I lost my agents because I was busy bringing new life into the world. I was anxious about my health and my baby’s, often feeling lost in the newness of motherhood. I watched my career, which I had built so carefully, seem to fade away. Now, I find myself feeling a bit sorry for those young actors who are stressing before auditions. I remember that feeling, but it’s a distant memory.

When I was a kid, a friend of my mom’s—an Emmy-winning actress—told me to walk into auditions with the mindset that I was the solution they needed. Guess what? After 30 years, I finally took her advice. At 40, I can walk into a casting office and feel confident that I’m exactly what they’re looking for.

Who knew that dedicating five years to the not-so-glamorous job of motherhood would leave me feeling younger, more beautiful, and more self-assured than ever? If you’re curious about more information on pregnancy and home insemination, check out this excellent resource at UCSF. And for those exploring self-insemination, you can find valuable products at Cryobaby.

In summary, transitioning from 35 to 40 has been a game-changer. Motherhood has reshaped my perspective and approach to my career, giving me newfound confidence and clarity.