Hey there! So, let’s talk about the differences between being 35 and 40, especially when it comes to motherhood. I found out I was pregnant at 35. As an actress, I felt like 35 was basically the same as being 40, which is often seen as a sort of last chance for many in this industry. I remember sitting outside an audition when I was 20 weeks along, jotting down some thoughts that hinted at my growing maturity.
Here’s what I noted:
- Motherhood is thrilling and a wild adventure, but it’s not the only journey I’m on. Acting is still a huge part of my life, and I’m just taking a break for a bit.
- I want my daughter to see me as a working actress. It’s essential for her to understand what auditions are and how I break down scenes. I want her to know that studying a script is part of my job.
- Being a soon-to-be mom has fueled my motivation. Even if my post-baby successes are small, what matters is that she sees me hustling and going after my dreams.
After writing this, I had a moment of nausea (thanks, pregnancy!). Fast forward, and I experienced the whirlwind of new motherhood—sleepless nights, messy hair, and a love like no other. Work-life balance? Well, maybe someday!
Now, here I am at 40, stepping back into the audition scene. You won’t believe what happened during my five-year hiatus from the industry. While I was gone, I actually improved my craft. I sat in a casting office the other day and watched younger actors chatting nervously, some trying to impress others about their recent gigs, while I just signed in for my slot on a fancy new iPad.
I pulled out my trusty spiral notebook again—yes, I still keep my headshots and resumes in a Trapper Keeper. Here’s what I realized:
- I feel completely calm before auditions now. I don’t know if that’s because of motherhood, but it feels liberating.
- I’m not concerned about what others think of me. I know if I’m the right fit for a role, I’ll get it.
- At 40, I’m happier with my appearance than I was at 35. I think my hair is shinier (okay, maybe that’s just in my head, but who cares!).
- I’m going to walk in and crush this audition, and if it doesn’t go my way, it won’t be because I didn’t do my best.
- Oh, and of course, the joys of motherhood—Cheerios, sunblock, and applesauce (my lists cover a lot!).
Five years ago, I lost my agents because I was busy bringing new life into the world. I was anxious about my health and my baby’s, often feeling lost in the newness of motherhood. I watched my career, which I had built so carefully, seem to fade away. Now, I find myself feeling a bit sorry for those young actors who are stressing before auditions. I remember that feeling, but it’s a distant memory.
When I was a kid, a friend of my mom’s—an Emmy-winning actress—told me to walk into auditions with the mindset that I was the solution they needed. Guess what? After 30 years, I finally took her advice. At 40, I can walk into a casting office and feel confident that I’m exactly what they’re looking for.
Who knew that dedicating five years to the not-so-glamorous job of motherhood would leave me feeling younger, more beautiful, and more self-assured than ever? If you’re curious about more information on pregnancy and home insemination, check out this excellent resource at UCSF. And for those exploring self-insemination, you can find valuable products at Cryobaby.
In summary, transitioning from 35 to 40 has been a game-changer. Motherhood has reshaped my perspective and approach to my career, giving me newfound confidence and clarity.