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Why Fat-Shaming Fails
Fat-shaming has become all too common these days. If you’re not familiar with the term, it basically means making fun of someone for being overweight. There’s been a lot of discussion about whether this approach has any real benefits. Can ridiculing someone for their weight ever lead to positive results? Even if someone does lose weight due to this kind of shaming, does it really justify the means? Or does it just leave them feeling even worse about themselves, having lost weight only to escape the bullying?
Let me share my experience with you.
Growing up, my mom constantly criticized her own body. She would stand in front of the mirror, pointing out every perceived flaw. Honestly, I can’t recall a single time she said something nice about herself. This negativity clearly impacted how I viewed my own body. I can remember being just 10 years old, falling in our neighbor’s yard and telling the dad who carried me home, “Put me down. I’m too fat to carry.” Yes, I was only 10.
As I got older, my mom’s scrutiny shifted to me. She’d casually comment on my weight, mentioning my “thick thighs” and suggesting the latest diet she was trying. (And let me tell you, she tried them all.) When I hit puberty, everything changed. I went from an A cup to a DD in what felt like no time. I was a confused, awkward teenager suddenly dealing with curves I didn’t know how to handle.
One evening, when my mom had friends over, she loudly remarked, “Gee, Jenna, don’t you think those jeans are getting a little tight?” The laughter from her friends pierced me deeply. I went to bed that night in tears. Her shaming didn’t motivate me to get fit; it made me wish I could vanish. If my own mother couldn’t see any beauty in me, who would?
Fast forward to today. I have a daughter, my adorable six-month-old, Mia. When she looks at me, all she sees is Mom, and I’m determined to keep it that way. I’m currently heavier than I’ve ever been, but I feel beautiful. My body created life, and that’s something to celebrate. I’ve learned to enjoy food in moderation, rather than hopping from diet to diet. Sure, I still have days when I struggle with body image, but those thoughts don’t control me anymore. If the weight doesn’t come off right away, that’s completely okay.
My mom and I have had deep conversations about our past. She opened up about how her own mother forced her to attend Weight Watchers and closely monitored her eating. She wanted to do better for me but unintentionally repeated the cycle of body shaming.
Shaming never leads to positive change. True transformation comes from love, understanding, and kindness. My daughter will never experience that kind of body negativity, and in a roundabout way, I owe my mom for that. Most importantly, Mia will grow up knowing that her self-worth isn’t tied to the size of her jeans.
If you’re interested in learning more about home insemination and pregnancy, check out this link and this one. For reliable information on pregnancy, visit the CDC website.
In summary, fat-shaming is ineffective and harmful. It doesn’t inspire change but fosters feelings of inadequacy. Instead, we should focus on supporting one another with love and compassion.