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I Insist on ‘Boredom Time’ for My Kids
If you had been within earshot of my house last night, you would have heard my child declaring me “the meanest mom ever!” His loud protests echoed through the house as he stomped off to sulk in his room. Why, you ask? I wouldn’t let him go swimming at the neighbor’s house. Again.
Now that my son is in school, his days are jam-packed with activities that start early in the morning when he hops on the bus and continue until bedtime after he’s done his homework and (twice a week) returned from kung fu lessons. That’s a lot of activity for a little kid!
So, I’ve made it a point to enforce “boredom time” several days a week. In an effort to combat the ever-increasing schedules that threaten to overwhelm and tire my son, I want to ensure he still has a chance to be a kid—using his curiosity and exploring the world around him. When I was younger, we just called it free time or quiet time. In our house, we refer to it as boredom time, which means we tap into our imaginations and creativity to find fun ways to pass the time.
During boredom time, screens are off-limits. No phones, tablets, or video games. Instead, we have a little library filled with books and a craft table loaded with supplies for building all sorts of wild creations. There’s also the option to go outside, create stories, sing songs, or even have goofy dance-offs. One time, we even had a staring contest that left my eyes twitching for the rest of the evening!
Childhood is fleeting enough as it is, so why fill it with nonstop activities just to rush through time? When we slow down, breathe, and really pay attention to each other, I discover what matters to my son, like his fascination with a particular ash tree in our backyard where he once spotted a butterfly cocoon.
It’s during these moments of boredom time that he shares elaborate stories filled with hilarious characters like farting pirates and kung fu monkeys. He opens up about his hopes and fears, trusting that talking to his parents is always safe. These hours spent together, free from distractions, encourage bonding and meaningful conversations that I believe are worth protecting.
As he gets older and school sports and social activities start to become more appealing, keeping this boredom time routine alive may become challenging. I have made a rule that he can only sign up for one extracurricular activity each school year. Dinner will always be a family affair, and I expect him to spend some weekends at home. Screens will remain unplugged while we stick to our house rule of embracing boredom to ignite creativity and fun.
After my son finished his stomping and sulking, we talked about how uncool he finds boredom time. As he yawned through his critique of my “silly rules,” he proudly showed me a drawing of a rocket ship he wants to build out of cardboard after school. He even wondered how much duct tape we’d need to make an escape hatch for alien invaders!
Though he may throw an angry fist in the air when boredom time isn’t what he wants to do, I have faith that he will eventually see the value in it that I do. These moments without screens, schedules, and social pressures will help him grow into a person who can appreciate the beauty in something as simple as a butterfly cocoon.
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In summary, enforcing boredom time allows my child to embrace creativity and foster meaningful connections, even if he doesn’t appreciate it right now. As he matures, I’m hopeful he will understand the importance of these moments spent together.