The 10 Types of People You Encounter During Your Infertility Journey

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Infertility is gaining more attention these days, and it’s about time. It’s no longer just a subject for fairy tales, where an elderly couple wishes on a flower and miraculously has a child with magical abilities. More and more individuals are starting to discuss their struggles, realizing they’re not alone. This is a crucial conversation to have.

My partner and I are once again navigating the challenging waters of infertility. We were fortunate enough to conceive our first child, which I like to call a stroke of luck, as we discovered we were expecting while undergoing testing. Now, we find ourselves back in the cycle of trying and testing, facing the diagnosis of “unexplained infertility.”

This condition often feels like a cloud of depression with no clear path to resolution—just a mix of uncertainty and hope. Thankfully, I have a solid support system in friends and family who understand the struggle. However, the most challenging part can be the well-meaning individuals who simply don’t grasp the reality of infertility. Here are ten types of people that can really get on your nerves:

1. The Textbook Experts

These folks often mean well, but they only skim the surface of infertility research. They spout off facts like, “You’re more likely to conceive after your first child,” or “If you’re ovulating, you’re fine.” Sometimes, even medical professionals fall into this trap, forgetting that not every body conforms to textbook standards. That’s where fertility specialists come into play.

2. The “Just Relax” Advocates

I can’t even. Whenever I express my concerns about our ongoing issues, someone invariably says, “Oh, you just need to relax.” Newsflash: Stress is a part of life! Whether it’s bills, a sick pet, or the chaos of parenthood, I can’t just zen my way out of a real medical condition. Yoga won’t fix this.

3. The “Fate” Believers

You know the type—those who attribute your struggles to divine intervention. When someone says, “It’s meant to be,” I want to scream. Nothing is left to chance! Even the Pope believes we have the tools to change our circumstances. I refuse to accept this condition when there are options like medicine and adoption available.

4. The Alternative Remedy Salespeople

In moments of despair, you might stumble across someone suggesting bizarre remedies. “Drink this tea, hop backwards under a full moon, and use these oils!” Yeah, right. No amount of herbal concoctions will solve infertility. Those who claim otherwise are either lucky or misled.

5. The “Have You Tried?” Commentators

These individuals make you feel like you’re failing basic sex ed. Yes, we’ve tried every position, eliminated birth control, and no, I don’t need to describe the intimate details of our attempts. Trust me, we’ve done our homework.

6. The Oblivious Friends

You share your struggles, and they just shrug it off. A few days later, it’s, “So, are you pregnant yet?” Really? It’s even worse when you mention important appointments, and they don’t even ask how they went.

7. The Overly Hopeful

These people are always on the lookout for any indication of pregnancy. I want to tell them that fatigue might just be from a sleepless night, or my breakouts are due to a new skincare product. Pregnancy symptoms and everyday feelings can overlap, and you know what? A positive test is what truly counts.

8. The Grateful Dread

Just because someone is battling infertility doesn’t mean they’re unhappy with their current life. Comments like, “You already have one child,” or “At least you have a roof over your head,” can be frustrating. Wanting more doesn’t mean being ungrateful.

9. The Fertile Myrtle

They mean no harm, but it can sting when they say things like, “It’s not that hard! If I can do it, so can you!” We all have different journeys, and that’s okay.

10. The “I Know Your Pain” Couples

Some folks might claim they understand your struggle, saying they went through a tough six months trying. But honestly, that’s not the same. Please, spare me the comparisons.

In summary, infertility can be a lonely road, made even tougher by the well-intentioned but often misguided comments from others. If you’re facing similar struggles, remember you’re not alone. Seeking support from a community that understands can make all the difference. For further resources, consider checking out Healthline’s excellent guide on IUI or explore the offerings at Cryobaby, a trusted source for home insemination kits.