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Why Moms Don’t Get Sick Days
Most families I know operate on complex schedules. They’ve mapped out who’s staying home and who’s heading to work, often balancing a mix of babysitters, daycare, or even Grandma’s help. A colorful calendar hangs on the fridge, filled with childcare plans, after-school activities, doctor appointments, and holiday markers. It all runs smoothly—most of the time—so long as everyone sticks to the plan and arrives on time.
But everything changes when Mom falls ill. The moment she senses a fever creeping in or experiences that first wave of nausea, the common thought is, “Oh no! Not now!” In reality, the entire household often hinges on Mom’s ability to keep everything afloat. If she gets sick, it feels like the whole ship could sink.
If Mom typically stays home but is too unwell to juggle a baby and a toddler, then Dad would need to take a day off to help her recover, right? Well, not quite. Many families decide that Dad should save his sick days for a “real” emergency or when he himself is under the weather. So, Mom ends up pushing through that awful stomach bug while attempting to entertain a toddler and an infant. And let’s be honest: TV is often a hit-or-miss solution. My little one can only be captivated by Elmo for about ten minutes before he’s off to explore the kitchen cabinets or, uh, other creative “activities.”
For moms with jobs outside the home, the situation can get even trickier. Many don’t have sick days available—either because they’re not salaried or their employer simply doesn’t provide them. Like their partners, they might want to save their sick days for when the kids are ill or when the babysitter calls in sick. Grandparents can be a fantastic backup in theory, but I, like many others, hesitate to expose my elderly parents to a contagious outbreak if I can avoid it.
In short, there are no sick days for moms. Last spring, my family of four was hit by a nasty virus, one by one. We each spent a week feeling terrible—first my older son, then my younger son, Dad, and finally, me. But by the time I got sick, I still had three others to care for! Someone had to supervise the kids when they were done with TV, run to the pharmacy for more baby Motrin, and take them to the pediatrician when fevers soared to 105 degrees.
My husband and I alternated caregiving duties based on our Tylenol intake. I’d take a dose, feel somewhat better, and then manage the kids for a while. He’d do the same, and we took turns like characters in a zombie movie—except we were in charge of little ones. We didn’t dare ask our sitters to help, fearing we’d pass on the virus, nor did we want to involve family for the same reason.
What’s the answer? Honestly, I’m not sure. In the midst of high fevers and a toddler who just won’t stop being sick, I often fantasized about checking us into a cozy clinic with caring nurses who could bring us ginger ale and broth.
But for now, that’s just wishful thinking. When you’re a mom, sick days simply don’t exist.
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Summary
Moms often find themselves without sick days, as the family schedule relies heavily on their ability to keep things running smoothly. When illness strikes, it typically falls on Mom to push through while managing the household. This scenario plays out repeatedly, with little-to-no support, leaving moms to juggle their health with caregiving responsibilities.