Why I Decided to Embrace My Curves at Work Today

home insemination Kit

Today was a turning point for me. I’ve been grappling with an ongoing issue at work for nearly a year and a half, and despite my efforts to address it, nothing seemed to work. So, I thought, why not take a stand in my own unique way? During our all-staff meeting today, I chose to give my project update while affectionately massaging my breasts. I started with my left hand, giving a gentle caress, then added my right hand for a simultaneous massage.

I didn’t make a fuss; there were no exaggerated gasps or laughter, just a calm demeanor while I spoke about important matters. My colleagues fell silent, with some stifling giggles and my friend Lisa almost in tears from trying not to laugh. A few were aware of my intention, as we had discussed it, while others pretended not to notice. But there were two men—let’s call them “The Fidgeters”—who seemed oblivious. These are the guys who can’t seem to resist adjusting themselves in public, as if they’re in a constant battle with their own anatomy.

One of them is my boss, a highly educated and seemingly professional man, who has this peculiar habit of fidgeting during meetings. I’ve tried to hint at it with a note suggesting he might want to see a doctor for his “itchy” issue, and even made exaggerated expressions when he adjusted himself. Nothing worked. My attempts to address it with the HR rep were met with laughter at first, but then panic when I suggested she should have a chat with him. After that encounter, she mysteriously quit.

Determined to give The Fidgeters a taste of their own medicine, I figured they needed to understand how uncomfortable their behavior is. While we often chatted about the awkwardness of their adjustments, they never crossed the line into inappropriate remarks. They were, in a way, model employees—except for the constant crotch-grabbing.

As the meeting wrapped up, I watched the Fidgeters to see if they’d catch my drift. They nodded as they left, which gave me a glimmer of hope. But as I observed them in the hallway, engaged in conversation while still adjusting themselves, I felt deflated. Was I really going to get through to them? It seemed unlikely.

Still, I felt a sense of accomplishment for trying something new. Who knows what my next move will be? Perhaps a group feel-up or a more elaborate display of self-love in the next meeting? I might even take it further and do a little dance while pinching my nipples! The options are endless, and the mundane office life could use a bit of spice.

If you’re interested in more about home insemination, check out this post on intracervical insemination. And for those looking to explore at-home insemination options, Make a Mom has all the essentials you need. Plus, for anyone curious about the effectiveness of IUI treatments, WebMD is an excellent resource to consult.

In summary, sometimes you have to take bold steps to make a point, even in a professional setting. While I may not have changed the Fidgeters’ behavior, at least I tried. The next time I’ll have to think even bigger!