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The Way I Parent Is None of Your Business
When my youngest started kindergarten a few years back, I suddenly found myself in the spotlight. As a stay-at-home mom, I was generating quite the buzz. People I hadn’t spoken to in ages were eager to know what I would do with my newfound free time while the kids were at school.
They seemed to expect grand plans—medical school, job hunting, or diving headfirst into volunteering. But my honest answer, “I’m just going to take some time for myself,” didn’t sit well with many. My husband, on the other hand, was all for it. “Yes, honey! You taking a break means more fun for us!”
Nobody seemed interested in my tales of wearing my son’s knee pads while scrubbing grout (trust me, pee stains are a serious issue) or how committed I was to mastering headstands. I couldn’t help but wonder why my life choices were of such interest to others.
My kids were all in school, leaving me with six hours of solitude each day—well, when you exclude teacher workshops, vacations, sick days, holidays, summer break, snow days, and various appointments. Yet, if my children weren’t in school and I opted for a few hours of peace at daycare, it was somehow everyone else’s concern.
If I choose to breastfeed my 4-year-old and my newborn in public, that’s my choice, not yours. If I happen to sip a glass of wine in front of my child, that’s my business too. But if you catch me driving with three kids in the car while enjoying a bottle of red, then I understand you might have something to say.
Let’s say I let my 10-year-old walk a few blocks to school with a friend—still not your business. But if I leave my child (or my dog) in a hot car while I dash into a store looking frantic, that’s a different story. If I give my child soda on a special occasion, that’s on me. However, if I invite your child over for a playdate and ignore your vegan preferences by serving bacon cheeseburgers, now we’ve got a problem.
If I express myself with a bit of swearing on social media, that’s my call. But if I refer to your child as a “little rascal,” then I understand it’s your concern. If I decide to take on a night job as a dancer to fund my kids’ college, it’s my life. But if I invite your kid to see my act, that crosses a line.
Letting my 8-year-old watch a PG-13 movie? Not your business. But if your daughter binge-watches a horror show with me and ends up with nightmares, that’s where you can weigh in. If I have “the talk” with my child at four because of a naughty song he learned, it’s my discretion. But if your child ends up sharing that song, I get why you’d care.
In my four decades of life, I’ve learned that focusing on my own family keeps me happier. I’ve got two kids navigating puberty and one who’s a master of spitballs at the dinner table. Honestly, I can’t handle any more outside opinions.
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Summary
This article humorously addresses the unsolicited opinions and judgments parents often face regarding their parenting choices, emphasizing the importance of minding one’s own business. It highlights various scenarios where parental decisions become a topic of interest or concern, while reinforcing that ultimately, it’s up to each individual family to navigate their choices.