Why I Stopped Warning My Friends About the Pain of Natural Birth

home insemination Kit

By: Jenna Thompson

My second birthing experience was a whirlwind—so fast that I didn’t even have time for an epidural, and let me tell you, it was intense. I was hoping for a repeat of my first delivery, which was manageable thanks to medication, but oh boy, was I in for a surprise! “Man plans and God laughs,” as they say, but it felt more like “woman plans and God is rolling on the floor, laughing hysterically.”

How was I to know that the seven hours of preparation I had for my first child would be squeezed down to just two with my second? To make matters worse, it coincided with a shift change at the hospital. By the time the new midwife arrived, I was deep into the “Aaaahhh, it’s happening!” phase, having already gone through the “This hurts—get me an epidural!” stage.

Pain surged through me in overwhelming waves, leaving me screaming so loudly that even my midwife snapped at me, “You’ll have a sore throat tomorrow if you keep that up. Get it together and start pushing!” After giving birth, I trembled for two hours from the emotional and physical toll of that speedy delivery. I felt as if my own body had betrayed me, and the shock was real. Contrary to what people say, I didn’t magically forget the pain as soon as I held my newborn. In fact, when I finally got to meet my little girl, my thoughts were more along the lines of, “What was the rush? Can I hand you off to your dad for a bit while I regroup?”

For a while, I thought it was my duty to prepare my soon-to-be-mom friends for the reality that natural birth can be really painful. I wanted them to have realistic expectations—not just the dreamy, rosy ideas that can sometimes overshadow the truth. “Just a heads up; it can hurt a lot!” I would caution them. But then, a friend of mine had a quick, unplanned birth, and she insisted it wasn’t painful at all. I was left scratching my head.

Was her baby smaller than mine? Did she have a different pain threshold? Maybe she was just better at handling stress? Or perhaps she had different expectations than I did? Deep down, I hoped she was just in post-birth denial, because facing the reality that her experience was so different from mine was tough to swallow.

Hearing her story made me realize it was time to take a step back. Why scare people with my stormy weather warnings when every birthing experience is so unique? Will knowing it might hurt really help anyone, or just add more anxiety?

The truth is, every birth is a one-of-a-kind journey. We each approach it with different bodies, readiness, and emotions. Whether we’re early, overdue, tired, or energized, all these factors can influence how we cope with pain and the overall birth experience. Let’s be honest: Mother Nature loves to keep us on our toes!

Time has passed since that intense experience, and while I still remember the emotions, the pain itself has faded. Now, when I meet a woman preparing to give birth, I listen with empathy and wish her a smooth delivery, knowing that what truly matters is the safety of both mother and child. The pain is temporary, but the joy of new life is forever.

If you’re interested in learning more about pregnancy and home insemination, check out this excellent resource on intrauterine insemination. For more insights into at-home options, visit this link for expert advice. And if you want to dig deeper into the topic, consider reading this post about natural birth experiences.

In summary, every birth story is unique, and while preparing for the possibility of pain is important, it shouldn’t overshadow the joy of bringing new life into the world.