10 Thoughts Moms Have, But Never Say Out Loud (Usually)

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If only you could tap into our minds… I think it’s safe to say, “Thank goodness you can’t!” Just imagine the chaos that would ensue. You’d discover how much we cherish the friendly faces in the carpool lane, adore the helpful cashiers at the corner store, and the joy we feel when we’re cleaning up after our partners who can’t seem to locate the laundry basket, dishwasher, or the bathroom! And oh boy, the things we hold back from telling our kids? Yikes! Here are 10 thoughts moms often think but rarely voice:

1. You’re my favorite—at this moment, anyway. This morning, however, your sibling was my top pick. It’s no secret we all have our favorites, even if it’s just a fleeting feeling. Kids can be adorable… while they’re snoozing.
2. Can you really be that ______? Fill in the blank with your choice of incredulity. Sometimes we’re just left speechless witnessing their antics, whether it’s an ambitious leap from the dresser or a downright baffling question (there, I said it).
3. You little ______! Again, you can imagine the word that fits here. Let’s just say, “sweetie” doesn’t always apply when you’re at your wits’ end. Relax, only the tiny angel on your shoulder is judging you.
4. I’m leaving and not coming back! A sentiment that may have escaped our lips more than once (raises hand!). Motherhood can be exhausting, but we do have our little victories: that first day back to school, holiday breaks, or grandma’s house. Just remember, one day they’ll grow up and fly the nest. Cherish the chaos!
5. I’m too tired for this today. Seriously, 4 a.m. is not a wake-up time; it’s more like an emergency room shift change. We’re not doctors, so let’s sleep a little longer, kids—how about until 6?
6. Why can’t you be more like ______? We know we shouldn’t compare our children, but let’s face it—sometimes we can’t help it. When stress hits, we might wonder why our little one can’t mirror their perfect cousin, Timmy. But remember, while one child is throwing a tantrum, the other is probably picking their nose in secret.
7. Your breath is something else! Everyone has morning breath, but not every 3-year-old gets to brush their teeth right away—especially after a night of open-mouthed snoring. Where’s that rooster when you need it?
8. Get your own snack, kid! Can’t a mom enjoy her food? Nope! In the eyes of a child, your snacks are theirs, too. Next time they reach for your sandwich, give them a playful growl like a lioness defending her dinner.
9. I want my mom! No matter how old you are, when chaos strikes—a gallon of milk spills, dinner burns, and the kids are sick—you just want your mom. And let’s face it, at that moment, mom’s name is probably “Xanax.”
10. Go to sleep already! Enough said.

It’s crucial to think before speaking around kids. They have a knack for repeating what they hear, and you might just find Grandma scheduling a visit soon.

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In summary, motherhood is filled with unspoken thoughts, hilarious moments, and the occasional chaos, but it’s all part of the journey.