11 Things Kids of Jewish Moms Know

home insemination Kit

Updated: August 26, 2019
Originally Published: February 11, 2016

When I made the leap from the Bay Area to Los Angeles for my studies at UCLA, I finally began to understand the depth of my mom’s love. While many of my friends had parents who only visited once or twice, my mom had meticulously planned quarterly visits. Each time, we enjoyed delicious dinners, embarked on shopping sprees for fresh clothes, and tackled the grocery store like we were contestants on a game show. Although I had a job on campus, my earnings went straight to savings or fun outings, since my parents were more than happy to cover my tuition. Education was a joy for them, and I thought that was just how things were.

But as I settled in, it became clear that I had a truly exceptional mom— a Jewish mom. Judaism isn’t just a faith; it’s a rich culture that treasures family, tradition, and connection as much as it adheres to its spiritual practices. Jewish mothers are famously strong, outspoken, and fiercely loving. This unique blend makes them remarkable caregivers, always just a phone call away.

Now, don’t assume that having a Jewish mother means life is a never-ending shopping spree. Jewish moms are as tough as they are nurturing. If you disappoint her, be ready for a gentle but persistent reminder. They love to give but expect one thing in return: don’t embarrass yourself or her! It’s essential for every Jewish kid to aim for good grades, come home for Rosh Hashanah, and remember to date someone with a stable job (and get married, but not too soon!).

So if you think being a Jewish mom sounds appealing (and it is!), here’s a peek into the Jewish motherhood experience:

1. Always have a meal ready or know where to grab one.
   For Jewish moms, “suffering” means being hungry. You’ll never see a Jewish mother without enough food to feed an army. After all, her ancestors spent 40 years wandering the desert—her kids won’t be going hungry on her watch!
2. Credit cards are for emergencies—like a sale at Bloomingdale’s.
   No matter your age, a Jewish mother will always want to ensure you have some cash for emergencies. And yes, a half-off sale definitely qualifies!
3. Turn every little crisis into a major emergency.
   If there’s one thing every Jewish mother excels at, it’s making mountains out of molehills. Expect a phone call asking, “Do you need me to come over?” for even the tiniest of mishaps.
4. You can never have too many pairs of black shoes.
   Jewish mothers are seasoned shoppers who love bringing their kids along. They’ll use all sorts of stealth to hide purchases from their husbands, but it’s a worthwhile endeavor because shopping together is a bonding experience.
5. Bragging about grandkids is totally acceptable.
   The only thing better than being a Jewish mother is being a Jewish grandmother. They’ll proudly declare their grandchildren (even the ones still in the womb) as perfect little prodigies. That’s just part of the job!
6. She may “like” your partner, but…
   Regardless of who you bring home—whether it’s a Nobel laureate or the guy from the local yogurt shop—your Jewish mother will always be polite but secretly hold reservations. After all, she’s protective of her daughters!
7. Grudges are part of the package.
   Jewish moms are fiercely loyal and possess a memory that can recall any slight against their kids, no matter how long ago it happened. Just mention an old acquaintance, and she’ll be quick to say, “Oh, I never liked that kid.”
8. Expect opinions, even decades later.
   A Jewish mother will support you through thick and thin—be it dropping out of school or making questionable relationship choices. But beware: years later, she’ll bring it up for a little “helpful” reflection.
9. Conversations about sex? Forget it.
   That’s a topic Jewish mothers tend to gloss over completely!
10. They know everything.
    From cooking to car trouble, there’s nothing a Jewish mother can’t handle—except maybe keeping her opinions to herself!
11. A Jewish mother’s support is unwavering.
    Perhaps the best quality of a Jewish mother is her unconditional support. She may sometimes need to set boundaries (like when you’re 47 and still at home), but she’ll always be there for you, often reminding you about what you should’ve done instead!

If you’re curious about more parenting tips or want to explore home insemination options, check out our other blog post for great insights. For an authoritative source on home insemination, visit Make a Mom. And if you’re looking for solid information on pregnancy, the CDC offers excellent resources.

Summary:

Being raised by a Jewish mother comes with unique experiences that blend love, tradition, and a sprinkle of humor. From culinary preparedness to strong opinions and unwavering support, the essence of a Jewish mom is both nurturing and memorable.