Hey there, New Guy I Just Met,
So, we hit it off recently. You flashed that charming smile, I returned it, and we chatted—a mix of my playful banter and your amusing tale about three guys and a cab driver. At some point, I casually mentioned that I’m a mother of two, and you didn’t run for the hills; kudos to you! It turns out we had enough in common to agree on a first date.
Now, you might be thinking that dating a single mom isn’t that big of a deal. Or maybe you’re used to seeking out women who seem more settled. Regardless of your perspective, I’d like to share some insights that could prove helpful as we navigate this new territory together.
1. My Kids Come First.
Always. If plans change unexpectedly, please don’t take it to heart. If I opt for a cozy night in with my little ones instead of a fancy event, it’s because my priorities lie with them. I’m cautious about introducing people into their lives who may not stick around, so if I don’t introduce you right away, it’s because we aren’t ready—it’s a team decision, not just mine.
2. Schedules Matter.
When I ask about your week, it’s not about keeping tabs on you. Between my career, my kids’ needs, and managing the household, my “me time” is scarce and usually booked in advance. If you want to hang out, let’s be proactive about planning!
3. Time is Precious.
Refer back to point two. If we’ve made plans and I’ve arranged for a babysitter, it’s crucial that you show up. I’m investing time and money into this date, so flaking isn’t an option. Additionally, if you’re not genuinely interested in a committed relationship, please let me know now.
4. Let’s Talk About My Kids.
Yes, again! I want to share stories about how my family operates and the amusing antics of my children. If you’re uninterested in my life as a mom, then we might not be a match.
5. I Have a Lot More to Discuss Beyond Motherhood.
I have a wealth of interests that don’t revolve around my kids. I want to know about your passions and dreams too. Help me step out of “mom mode” and see me as the vibrant woman I am. And, please, use my first name often—it feels good to be seen as more than just a mom.
6. Be Polite, But Don’t Hold Back.
I’m not looking for a bland experience; I want to enjoy myself! Treat me like the fun-loving woman I am. Yes, I have a sarcastic side, but I’m also sophisticated. It’s a balance I navigate daily, and I appreciate your understanding.
7. My Ex-Husband is Off-Limits.
Let’s avoid any negative talk about him. We’re both figuring out co-parenting, and I’d prefer your support over judgment.
8. I’m Not Desperate or Helpless.
Being a single parent is tough, but I don’t seek pity. I’m looking for a partner, not someone to swoop in and save the day. Please respect my independence.
9. Please Be Understanding.
I’m used to doing things on my own, and it might take time for me to adjust to accepting help. Encourage me gently to let my guard down.
10. Above All, Be Patient.
Dating as a single mom is a different journey. I might have moments of doubt or my kids might take time to warm up to you. Let’s agree to be calm and thoughtful in our approach.
Thank you, New Guy, for taking the time to read this. Ready to grab that cup of coffee? Just let me know!
For more insights on parenting and relationships, check out our other posts, such as this one about home insemination, or visit Make a Mom for helpful resources. And if you’re interested in pregnancy topics, this site has great information too.
Summary:
This guide offers essential insights for men dating single mothers, emphasizing the importance of understanding, respect, and patience. The priorities of a single mom revolve around her children, and potential partners should be supportive and adaptable while also engaging her as an individual beyond motherhood.