What My Child’s Adoration for My Belly Has Taught Me About Beauty

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My little one has an extraordinary fondness for my belly. To him, it’s a sanctuary, a source of comfort and security. Whenever he gets hurt, I scoop him up, and he snuggles into my chest and belly. With his chubby little hand resting on my soft skin, he says, “I rub you belly,” and it fills my heart with warmth.

When he craves some quality time with me, he often slides his hand under my shirt, exploring my stomach. He enjoys looking at it, playing with it, jumping on it, and laying his head on it. As long as he can connect with it in some way, he’s content. Just the other day, as he sat in my lap and found my belly, he declared, “Your belly my home.” (Cue my heart melting.)

It’s true. My belly has been a home to all three of my children, and in many ways, it continues to be a place of comfort for them.

What’s funny is that while my kids adore my belly, there are aspects of it that I struggle with. The things they cherish about it are often the very things I find difficult to accept. Whether it’s how soft it is, the rolls that appear when I sit, or the stretch marks, these are the features that society tells me I should change. Some days, I even find myself agreeing with those societal standards.

Despite my commitment to exercise and maintaining a healthy lifestyle, there’s no amount of planking that can erase the loose skin that’s a reminder of carrying three babies (two of whom were twins). There are certain realities about my body that I must simply accept, and while they can make me self-conscious, my boys consistently remind me that I am beautiful.

To them, I am perfect. My saggy belly is their home, and my body—imperfect as it may be—is a source of peace for them. They don’t see the cellulite or the belly rolls; they simply see their mama.

It can be tough to hold on to the beauty our children see in us when we’re bombarded by external definitions of beauty. It’s challenging to remember that our worth is not determined by our appearance but by the love and kindness we embody. Yet, I am determined to trust my children’s perception over the world’s judgment.

We need to embrace the truths we tell our little ones and stop subjecting ourselves to the harsh criticisms we often impose. Would we ever tell our children the negative things we say about ourselves? It’s heartbreaking to think about how we would feel if we heard them speak that way.

Our children are learning from us; they are observing how we treat ourselves and internalizing those messages. When they see us disparaging our bodies, they begin to question their own worth. If they believe we see ourselves as flawed, how could they possibly feel secure in their own skin?

As mothers, we wouldn’t stand for it if our children criticized themselves the way we do. We would rush to defend them, highlighting their beauty and worth. So why don’t we do that for ourselves?

Let’s stop arguing with our children about their perception of our beauty. Let’s appreciate our bodies for the life-giving miracles they are and release the unrealistic standards imposed by society. In the eyes of our children, we are perfect.

Children inherently see beauty in honesty and love. They don’t judge body parts until we teach them to. So let’s love ourselves with the same fervor that we love our children, and let’s reflect the love they have for us in how we see ourselves.

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Summary:

This heartfelt post reflects on a mother’s journey of self-acceptance through her child’s innocent love for her body. It emphasizes the importance of embracing our imperfections and recognizing our worth beyond societal standards. The narrative encourages mothers to appreciate their bodies as vessels of love and life, reinforcing that children perceive beauty through the lens of love and acceptance.