When your little ones finally make their grand entrance, all that advice you’ve absorbed about newborns may feel utterly useless. If you’re expecting twins, you can toss that wisdom out the window well before they arrive. At just 26 weeks along, I was hospitalized and given a cocktail of medications to halt my contractions. Thank goodness I didn’t spend too much time debating whether to go for a natural birth or a C-section, since the babies had other plans and made their debut a few weeks later.
Thus began our whirlwind journey into the first six months of parenting. Oh, how I wish someone had prepared me for the reality of raising newborn twins. It’s exhausting, overwhelming, and not at all the blissful experience you might have imagined. I didn’t feel that instant, all-consuming love many new moms describe, which only added to my guilt. My partner and I were in full survival mode, and to be honest, we were not having a great time. If you’re wondering whether things will improve, take heart—they will! In the meantime, here are some tips that helped us make it through those challenging first six months.
1. Grocery Delivery is Your Best Friend
Trust me, you’re not lazy or failing as a mom. You’re being smart and resourceful. Save your energy for the endless diaper changes instead of dragging yourself to the store.
2. Organize a Meal Train with Friends
You might be lucky to find 15 minutes for food prep between all the chaos. If you get an extra 15, it should be used for catching up on sleep! The joy of having home-cooked meals that you can simply heat up is like dining at a five-star restaurant when managing newborn twins—so get your friends involved!
3. Join a Local Twin Moms Group
Initially, I felt a bit silly joining a group of twin moms, believing I could lean on my existing friends for support. But when I hit that three-month mark and felt my sanity slipping, the camaraderie of those women became invaluable. They truly “get it” in a way others cannot.
4. Don’t Hesitate to Ask for Help
Seriously—don’t shy away from asking for assistance. You and your partner will be working around the clock, and the days will blur together. Having someone you trust to watch the little ones while you grab a nap is pure gold.
5. Prioritize Sleep
Sleep is your Holy Grail during these exhausting months. If you have to choose between tidying up and hitting the pillow, let sleep triumph every single time. Even if you had the chance to meet Beyoncé, sleep should still be your priority!
6. Invest in Convenience
Sick of living in a mess? Hire a cleaner for a few months. Want to minimize bottle washing? Buy more bottles. Think a second swing might help? Go for it! Spending a little money can make life so much easier.
7. Think in Bulk
I’m not just talking about stocking up on diapers (although that’s essential). When possible, do things in bulk—like washing bottles twice a day instead of eight. The more efficient you are, the better.
8. Find Your Unwind Time
Whether it’s a nightly walk, a glass of wine, or watching your favorite show while feeding the babies, carve out moments for yourself. Your mental health is important!
9. Embrace Late-Night Reality
Accepting that being awake at 3 a.m. is your new normal can really shift your mindset. Treat those nighttime hours like daytime—snack, watch TV, or even take a stroll. It can help reduce the grumpiness!
10. Forget the Singleton Standards
Comparing yourself to singleton moms can be a slippery slope. While they seem to have it all together, you’re juggling twice the babies! It’s perfectly fine if your twins are in onesies and you’re rocking pajamas for days.
Looking back, I’m amazed we survived. A year later, life is good—busy and chaotic, yes, but also fulfilling. Those first six months are undeniably tough, so take it one hour at a time. And when the going gets tough, remember to reach out to your twin mom support group and cut yourself some slack—you’ll find your groove soon enough.
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