The Joy of Solitude with Your Partner

home insemination Kit

My partner Alex and I strolled through the local university campus, both of us in our early 30s and trying to blend in with the sea of vibrant 18 to 22-year-olds. While we didn’t appear particularly old, surrounded by their youthful exuberance in trendy spring outfits, I couldn’t shake the feeling that we looked like relics from a bygone era. Perhaps it was our leisurely pace, savoring each moment while they dashed off to whatever exciting adventure awaited them.

This term marks Alex’s final semester in college after a long and winding journey. She’s been juggling her studies for nearly five years, attending the same university where I work. Most of her courses have been online, but now that she’s nearing the finish line, it’s all in-person classes. Thankfully, we found a fantastic neighbor to watch our kids while Alex attends her classes, allowing us to steal brief moments together.

Twice a week, whether it’s meeting for lunch in the quad or sharing a quick kiss in my office, we cherish those fleeting encounters. On this particular day, as fate would have it, we crossed paths and walked together, hand in hand, a rare treat amidst our busy lives filled with work and parenting chaos.

When I envisioned marriage, I never imagined it would involve such simple yet profound moments—two people in their 30s, over a decade into their relationship, enjoying a peaceful walk on campus. But that’s the reality of married life with young children. It’s about two individuals deeply in love, navigating the challenges of life while supporting each other’s dreams and ambitions. It’s a whirlwind of responsibilities, sleepless nights, and the occasional playful debate about who gets the last cookie.

As we strolled, our conversations ranged from our kids’ antics to school projects and life’s little hiccups. I offered Alex tips for navigating university life, and she gently reminded me to fix the collar on my shirt. Occasionally, we’d catch the curious glances of passing students, who might have thought we looked a bit out of place. It’s amusing when they suggest I should “modernize” myself because I’m not up to speed with the latest social media trends like Snapchat. I often want to share the joy of our simple walk—the tranquility of a moment without kids yelling or shoes being lost—it was refreshing, like a cool drink on a hot day. But I realize they wouldn’t fully grasp this sentiment, just as I wouldn’t have at their age.

This is likely why Alex and I, walking hand in hand, seem like an oddity on campus. We treasure these moments of quiet togetherness. Our priorities have shifted from seeking the latest trends to simply enjoying each other’s company. And that’s what can make marriage feel constraining initially; it takes time to understand what truly matters.

Marriage and parenting don’t diminish your standards; they realign your priorities. You start to value the person you’re with and make the most of those fleeting moments when you can just be together.

As I dropped Alex off at our minivan parked between a flashy truck and a sporty little car, I couldn’t help but say, “Thanks for the walk; it was the best part of my day.” My words carried a hint of sarcasm about returning to work, but honestly, it truly was the highlight.

She smiled and replied, “Anytime. I love you.” We shared a kiss, lingering a bit longer than necessary—without our kids nearby to say “ewww”—and I noticed a couple of young women watching us, probably bemused by our public display of affection. I offered them a sheepish smile, as if to say, “One day, you’ll get it.”

If you found this reflection relatable, you might also enjoy some of our other discussions on parenting and relationships. For example, check out this piece on home insemination as an option for growing your family.

In summary, the simple pleasure of being alone with your spouse is a treasure that often gets overlooked amid the chaos of daily life. Finding joy in those little moments can redefine your relationship and remind you of what truly matters.