I had a rather peculiar moment recently while parenting my two little ones. Picture this: we’re at the kitchen table, casually munching on graham crackers and listening to the news on the radio when calamity strikes—my preschooler and toddler start hitting each other. Now, as any parent of young boys knows, this is a regular occurrence. “Hey, no hitting!” I exclaimed. “We don’t hit our brothers.”
Right then, Donald Trump’s voice burst through the radio. “I was gonna hit this guy so hard, his head would spin,” he said, referring to a speaker from the opposing party. I quickly turned off the radio, hoping to drown out his unhelpful rhetoric and reinforce the values of brotherly love I was trying to instill.
This is what parenting looks like in the era of Trump—trying to teach our children that their words and actions matter, all while witnessing a high-profile figure, a presidential candidate no less, model behavior that contradicts those principles. It’s not a new challenge; I often remind my kids to avoid name-calling, even as one of the candidates hurls insults like “Crooked Hillary” or “Lyin’ Ted” at his opponents. While I advocate for respect, Trump is on the screen behind me, ridiculing a disabled reporter.
A major party candidate not adhering to the same basic standards of decency I set for my 2- and 3-year-olds—be nice, use kind words, don’t hit—creates more than just sensational headlines. We might think we can shield our little ones from the world’s harsh realities, but they absorb far more than we realize. They hear the radio, catch glimpses of campaign speeches, and overhear our discussions about the election with friends.
Adults can often sift through Trump’s rhetoric, but children take his incendiary comments at face value. This can have serious consequences. Earlier this year, a mother reported that her third-grade son was bullied by peers who taunted him about being deported once Trump took office. The anger they overhear will inevitably be echoed on the playground.
Even if Trump doesn’t win, the impact of his divisive language is unlikely to vanish on November 8. He’s already suggesting the election could be rigged and hinting at “Second Amendment solutions” if he loses. This attitude is bound to trickle down from the podium to the playground long after the votes are counted.
Let’s not forget, Trump is tapping into the frustrations of many Americans who have felt overlooked as the economy shifts. They need a voice, and he’s become their megaphone. Yet, we also witness how he treats those who disagree with him harshly, like when he insulted the mother of a fallen soldier. If this is how he responds to someone grieving, what empathy would he have for the unemployed factory worker or the overwhelmed parent struggling to afford childcare?
Currently, my kids are blissfully unaware of the political landscape, preferring to wrestle with each other. I’m all for a bit of roughhousing, but we have rules: no horse collaring, no face punches, and definitely no kicking someone while they’re down. Yet, day after day, Trump seems to bypass these basic rules of engagement, relentlessly mocking anyone who crosses his path.
The next president will guide my children through critical transitions—from home to preschool and then to elementary school—where they’ll learn about our country’s foundations of freedom, justice, and equality. I wonder if the lessons they learn will align with what they observe in society or if disdain will become the norm, making discussions about tolerance seem like outdated fairy tales.
This election isn’t just about picking our next president; it’s about determining the kind of conversation we expect from our leaders. We must decide if the values we teach our children—kindness, the impact of words and actions—are merely tools for obedience or if they’re essential for fostering a well-functioning society. If it’s the latter, behavior like Trump’s cannot be tolerated.
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In summary, as parents navigating this unique political climate, we must be vigilant about the influences shaping our children’s values. The next election will determine not only our leadership but also the kind of discourse we want to model for future generations.