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How to Hit Pause When You’ve Found That Perfect Parenting Moment
By: Jamie Parker
If there’s one word that encapsulates my experience with parenting, it’s “eager.” I was eager to be pregnant, then eager to no longer be pregnant. I eagerly anticipated my child’s first steps, first words, and then the next baby as soon as I could. It felt like a never-ending cycle of looking forward to the next milestone, always chasing the next phase that promised to be better or easier.
When my baby sleeps, I think I’ll finally relax. When he can talk, I’ll feel more connected. When he starts school, I’ll have a little freedom. Unbeknownst to me, I was always rushing through the present, waiting impatiently for the future.
But not anymore.
Now, I want to freeze time, hit pause, or at least slow things down a bit. My boys are 6 and nearly 10, and we’ve reached what many call “the sweet spot.” The parenting struggles have lessened, while the joys remain abundant. They stroll to school with friends, require less supervision, but still crave cuddles and affection. They come to us with their fears and big questions, and while they enjoy bedtime rituals, they don’t need us to lie down with them anymore. They freely express their love, showing how they’re becoming more independent, yet still need us in all the right ways.
Now, don’t get me wrong; every stage brings its own ups and downs. We still deal with tantrums, sibling squabbles, and I still have to remind them to bathe every night. But overall, this phase feels more sweet than bitter. I find myself calmer, more confident, and less restless. We’ve found our rhythm in this dance of parenting, managing to avoid stepping on each other’s toes for now—though I know that might change during the teenage years.
I had long heard about this elusive sweet spot and waited eagerly for it. And now that I’m experiencing it, I can say it’s even better than I imagined. For the first time, I want to linger in this moment rather than rush through it.
This sweet spot is delightful not just for me as a parent but for my children as well. I want to cherish this stage not only for my sake but for theirs too. Their world is still filled with possibilities, and their spirits remain unscathed by life’s harsh realities. Their innocence hasn’t been tainted by heartbreak, and their hopes remain bright amid life’s inevitable disappointments. This phase encapsulates some of the best aspects of human nature, and as a parent, it’s a privilege to witness their joyful explorations in these blissful days of childhood. More often than not, I find myself wishing for a way to hit pause and soak it all in.
In the whirlwind of parenting, we can get so caught up in the challenges of raising our kids to be decent humans that we overlook the sweet joys that come with it. Some days feel like a series of mini battles, and in our quest to fight the good fight, we can lose sight of the happiness that surrounds us. We often rush from one task to another, extinguishing one fire after the next, forgetting that, despite the chaos, this life we’re living is pretty great—really great.
Every parent finds their own sweet spot. For some, it’s the newborn stage; for others, it’s the teenage years. For me, it’s right here, right now. While we can’t stop time or press pause, we can take a moment to appreciate the goodness of this parenting phase. We can acknowledge the happiness that thrives amid the daily chaos and exhaustion.
Perhaps that’s how we truly hit pause—by taking a moment, even in the midst of the storm that is our messy, unpredictable, and chaotic lives, to recognize that this moment, whatever it is, is good. Really good.
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Summary
This article explores the author’s journey through parenting, highlighting the importance of savoring the current phase instead of rushing to the next milestone. It emphasizes finding joy in the present, acknowledging the challenges, and recognizing that each stage holds its own unique sweetness. The author reflects on the privilege of witnessing their children’s innocence and vitality while encouraging other parents to appreciate the good amidst the chaos of parenting.