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It’s Okay to Have a Meltdown as a Mom
Parenting can push anyone to their limits, and I recently experienced one of those moments. My kids and I had just gotten back from school when I snapped. “Go to your rooms!” I barked, my voice sounding more like a grumpy troll than a caring mom. “Now!”
Naturally, this was met with tears and protests. I raised my hands in frustration, my anger escalating to a surprising level. “I don’t want to hear it! Don’t even look at me. Just go!”
You might think I’m a heartless villain from a children’s story, but let me set the record straight: I’m typically a nice person. If you saw me in public, I’d likely smile and let you cut in line. I dislike conflict, which is why I often let my kids’ daily antics slide.
However, this desire for harmony comes at a price. The frustration, anger, and all those messy emotions I bury deep down don’t just vanish. They accumulate, fueled by the regular chaos of small children — the endless bickering, the whining, the sass, and yes, even Play-Doh disasters. Eventually, they build up until I can no longer contain them, resulting in an emotional eruption.
That day, after a morning filled with sibling squabbles that nearly made us miss the bus and an irritating car ride home, I hit my limit. An annoying comment from my oldest sent the little one into a high-pitched frenzy, and I could feel a headache creeping in. I realized I was not going to tolerate it anymore.
So, I ordered the kids to their rooms and paced the kitchen, waiting for my husband to return from work. As soon as he walked in, I declared, “I just can’t handle them right now.”
I grabbed my car keys and drove aimlessly into town, parking in a lot while feeling the weight of my emotions. As I sat there, tears threatening to spill and the radio flickering on and off, the heaviness in my chest began to lift. After a while, I made my way back home.
When I entered the kitchen, my daughters rushed toward me with hugs and a card that read: “Dear Mom, we’re sorry we were naughty.” The remnants of my anger dissolved as I read their heartfelt apology. I took a moment to apologize for my outburst, explaining how their fighting made me feel sad and frustrated because I knew they loved each other. We discussed the importance of respecting one another’s feelings and personal space. They promised to improve, and I believed them — at least for a little while.
Do I think I should express my frustrations more regularly instead of bottling them up? Absolutely. I’m consciously working on it. However, I also recognize that there isn’t a single correct way to handle the whirlwind of motherhood. Each day, we all do our best to balance maintaining peace and keeping our sanity intact.
In the past, I believed there were perfect moms out there who never lost control or raised their voices, effortlessly teaching their kids about discipline. Now, I know better. A calm and collected mom 100% of the time is as mythical as unicorns and husbands who always pick up their socks — they simply don’t exist.
Whether you find yourself having a meltdown every day or just once a year, you’re not a monster. Sometimes, those meltdowns are essential. They help us reset and remind our kids that adults have feelings too, just like they do. If we are open to it, a meltdown can provide a chance to reconnect and reinforce how we want to treat one another.
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Summary
It’s entirely normal for moms to experience meltdowns; they can be a necessary release of pent-up emotions. While striving for perfect parenting may seem appealing, it’s crucial to embrace the reality that nobody is flawless. Allowing ourselves to feel and express frustration can lead to better communication with our children and ultimately strengthen family bonds.