Your grandmother handed them down to your mom, your mom passed them on to you, and now, you find yourself saying the same things to your own kids. It’s a shocking realization — are you becoming your mother? Relax. You’re not echoing these phrases because you’re turning into her; you’re using them because they hold a grain of truth. These parental maxims stick around for a reason: they capture something essential about the dynamics between kids and parents. They may seem annoying or even outdated, but their relevance endures.
I’m not your housekeeper.
This was my mom’s daily mantra. She felt the need to tidy up after me, and while it’s part of a parent’s role to pick up after their children, there’s a limit. You’re not responsible for that sword in the dining room, the Legos scattered across the living room, or the couch cushions that mysteriously migrated to your bedroom. Hampers are there for a purpose, kiddos. Use them!
Were you raised in a barn?
A snarky retort to the classic question, “Jesus was born in a barn,” followed quickly by, “And he always picked up after himself.” I frequently heard this when I left the door open — a common flaw in children, as if they’re incapable of closing doors. This saying also applies to cups left lying around, inappropriate table manners, and clothes that seem to multiply on the floor.
Just wait until your dad gets home.
This phrase doesn’t imply that Dad is the family’s main enforcer or the head honcho. It simply means Mom is biding her time before laying down the law — and when she finally does, little Jimmy will find himself outnumbered and outmatched. We relish the anticipation of hearing our partner exclaim, “He did what?!” while the kid is left to dread the impending consequences (a classic mom-ism).
Mom needs a drink.
#truth #allthetime #passthewine
No one deserves a drink more than mothers. No other job requires you to handle open rebellion, screams, messes, and the repetitive reading of Goodnight Moon for the umpteenth time in a single day. When your kids do something utterly ridiculous that leaves you in disbelief, it’s time to reach for that glass — you’ve earned it!
You’ll get it when you’re older.
Typically said during discussions about everything from personal responsibility to the dangers of excessive sugar, this catch-all phrase will likely leave your child fuming. You’ll feel a sense of satisfaction because it’s a go-to line for when you’re out of reasons. It’s like throwing your hands up in defeat and saying, “I’ve got nothing left!”
It is what it is.
My dad loved this phrase as a way to explain life’s little annoyances. It gives off a wise vibe, but really, it’s just code for “Shut up. I’m not changing my mind.”
You’ll ruin your eyes.
If I ever sat too close to the TV or read in dim lighting, Grandma would snap, “You’ll ruin your eyes!” It’s really just a less annoying way to say “Stop it!” Mothers can’t just say “That’s irritating,” so they fall back on this old chestnut. And if the kid ends up needing glasses, the classic “I told you so” awaits.
Nothing feels better than saying, “I told you so.”
Mothers are notorious for repeating the same warnings (like “You’ll shoot your eye out!”). When the inevitable happens, it’s a small comfort for us, even as it deepens the kid’s misery — hopefully reminding them to listen next time.
Just wait until you have kids.
If you think “I told you so” feels good, this phrase is pure gold. It suggests that your child’s current behavior will come back to haunt them as a parent. It’s a final attempt to get in a jab during a losing battle, aimed at both annoying your child and sealing their fate!
I brought you into this world, and I can take you out of it.
Let’s be real: you can’t actually do that. But it sounds powerful! This phrase, like many others mentioned, is a desperate attempt at control, but oh, does it feel satisfying to say. It’s a line that can earn nods of approval from onlookers when said in public.
You get what you get, and you don’t throw a fit.
It rhymes, making it even more annoying! This line is perfect for teaching kids that they won’t always get their way, whether it’s getting the yellow cup instead of the green one or having to eat a PB&J when they wanted something else. The sing-song quality makes it particularly effective with toddlers, but it can also yield extra sass when used on teens.
Yes, these phrases are exasperating, but they’re also timeless, echoing the struggles of parents through the ages. Your mom used them. Your grandma did too. Now, they’re coming out of your mouth, and someday, your kids will pass them on. You might even enjoy pointing this out to them when the time comes.
For more insights, check out this post on our other blog. Also, for more information on the journey of home insemination, visit Make a Mom. And for those interested in understanding assisted reproductive technology, the CDC offers excellent resources.
Summary:
This light-hearted exploration delves into classic parenting phrases that have been passed down through generations. From “I’m not your maid” to “You’ll understand when you’re older,” these sayings encapsulate the frustrations and realities of parenting. While they may seem outdated, their truths resonate with parents today. Embracing these parental maxims can sometimes bring a sense of comfort in the chaos of raising children.