Every year, as the weather warms and the days grow longer, I look forward to spring. I can almost taste the joy of kids playing outside, the thrill of flowers blooming, and the delight of having my windows open without worrying about snow. However, despite my love for the season, I find myself less than thrilled about Easter. Before you give me the side-eye, let me clarify: my issue isn’t with the religious significance of the day. Easter Mass can be quite uplifting, especially after a long, dreary winter.
What I can’t stand are the overwhelming preparations and traditions that come with being a parent during this holiday. Last year, I found myself in a frenzied Walmart just hours before Easter, battling other frazzled parents for half-melted chocolate bunnies and the last of the jelly beans. That’s when it hit me: playing the role of the Easter Bunny isn’t exactly a hop in the park. Easter has morphed into the spring equivalent of Christmas, and quite frankly, it’s exhausting. Why is every holiday turning into a production?
1. Dyeing Easter Eggs is Overrated.
Sure, decorating eggs sounds fun in theory. Beautifully colored eggs nestled in a basket are a lovely sight. But if you’re a parent, you know the chaos that comes with it. The smell of vinegar is overwhelming, you end up boiling dozens of eggs to keep everyone happy, and the dye stains everything it touches. By the end of it, everyone’s in tears, and the fun is gone. Thanks a lot, Paas.
2. Too Many Hard-Boiled Eggs.
After the dyeing marathon, you find yourself stuck with a mountain of eggs. Eating hard-boiled eggs for breakfast is fine for a day or two, but after that, it becomes a chore. Egg salad with weird-colored eggs? No thanks.
3. Easter Basket Grass is a Nightmare.
Who thought shredded plastic grass was a good idea? It ends up in every nook and cranny of my house, lingering until summer. If I ever meet the inventor, I might just give them a piece of my mind.
4. Easter’s Date is a Headache.
Every year, Easter falls on a different date, which throws me for a loop. I can barely remember to pack the kids’ lunches, let alone keep track of when Easter is. Can’t we just pick a date already? Thanks for nothing, Easter Bunny.
5. Kids Get Dirty in Their Easter Clothes.
I admit, I love seeing my kids in their cute Easter outfits. But just minutes after putting them on, they look like they’ve been rolling in the dirt. I’ve given up on fancy attire long ago.
6. Black Jelly Beans are the Worst.
Seriously, who decided that black jelly beans belong in Easter baskets? They should be banned from all celebrations.
7. The Easter Bunny is Creepy.
No one warned me that I’d be endorsing the myth of a giant bunny breaking into our home. The Easter Bunny is a little too weird for my taste, and I’m surprised my kids aren’t freaked out by it.
8. Easter Baskets Have Become a Mini Christmas.
As a kid, my Easter basket was simple: a few jelly beans and a chocolate bunny. Now, it’s like parents are trying to outdo each other with extravagant baskets filled with gifts that rival Christmas. And don’t get me started on the elaborate scavenger hunts!
9. Peanut Butter Eggs Need to be Year-Round.
Why are these delicious treats only available for a limited time? I need my peanut butter egg fix all year long, not just for a few weeks in spring.
10. Endless Easter Egg Hunts are Draining.
I remember going to one egg hunt as a kid. Now, it feels like every corner has an event, and I’m expected to attend them all. It’s tiring and honestly, kind of boring.
Yes, I know my days of playing the Easter Bunny won’t last forever, and one day I’ll miss the joy on my kids’ faces. But that day is not today. For now, I’ll just be over here hoarding peanut butter eggs in my closet.
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In summary, while I cherish the beauty of spring, Easter has turned into a stressful ordeal for parents. The traditions have become more of a chore than a joy, and I can’t help but wish for simpler times.