My little girl is about to turn two, and oh how time flies! When my son hit his second birthday, I was in the best shape of my life. I was working out regularly—sometimes even twice a day—because I genuinely enjoyed it. I was eating healthily, with just enough indulgences to keep things interesting. Before having kids, though, my lifestyle was anything but active or nutritious.
After my son arrived, I dabbled in dieting and exercising, managing to lose some of the 50 pounds I gained during my first pregnancy. Everything felt right when he turned 18 months old, and I finally found my rhythm again. On his second birthday, I took a pregnancy test, and to my surprise, I was already two weeks pregnant! My husband and I had just begun trying for a second child.
Initially, we imagined spacing our kids two to three years apart. I figured I’d have one out of diapers before popping out another. But now, as we dream of a third child, I’m hitting the brakes on getting pregnant for at least another year because I still haven’t shed the weight from my last pregnancy—zero progress, folks.
Now, some might think this sounds superficial, and you know what? It kind of is. But it’s also about how I feel. I miss being comfortable in my own skin like I was when my son was a toddler. After having him, I felt better about my body than I ever did before kids. I’ve never been one to embrace body positivity, nor have I had the healthiest relationship with food—except during that beautiful window when I was able to find a routine that jived with our lifestyle.
I gained 40 pounds during my last pregnancy, and the battle to lose it has been a rollercoaster ride. One week I see a little progress, only to gain it back the next. My biggest hurdle? Making self-care a priority while juggling a house and two kids. Sure, there’s time in my day and opportunities to change habits, but it also feels like there’s a mountain of chores, errands, and meals to manage. Often, my well-being lands at the bottom of that to-do list.
This time around has been a different ball game. I started running regularly and eating better, feeling great until I took a tumble down the stairs. A hematoma on my hip made even walking a challenge, so goodbye jogging! It took weeks before I could even handle grocery shopping solo. Then, migraines crashed the party. I’d find my rhythm for a week, only for a migraine to knock me out for days, derailing my progress. It’s a cycle that’s hard to break.
Let’s not forget about energy levels. I’m tired—constantly. But exercising regularly tends to give me more energy; it’s a vicious cycle. And then there’s food. When you lean on snacks as a source of comfort during stressful days, it’s all too easy to slip back into that habit. I’ll indulge after a tough day, promising myself I’ll do better tomorrow, but “tomorrow” keeps getting pushed further away.
So, here’s the deal: I won’t be getting pregnant again until I lose this weight, and I want to maintain that loss long enough to feel confident about it. Right now, the person I see in the mirror isn’t someone I recognize or like. She seems sad, frustrated, and stuck—definitely not the vibe I want to carry into another pregnancy. I refuse to be even unhappier in my own skin by starting the baby-making process before I’m ready.
My husband and I both want another child, and I’m practically ready in every other area of life. It’s frustrating that my weight is the only thing standing in the way of what I know I want. Prioritizing myself—truly putting myself first—is a challenge, but it’s essential. I’m slowly working my way back into a routine and being extra cautious on those stairs. I want to look in the mirror and recognize myself again, and I do hope to dive back into baby-making soon, but not just yet.
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Summary
After a challenging journey of weight management post-pregnancy, Emma has decided to wait before trying for baby number three. Balancing self-care while managing two kids has proven difficult, but she’s committed to finding her groove again before expanding her family.