10 Indications You May Have a Wild Child

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Our first kid was the epitome of decorum. From the very start, she was gracious, gentle, and composed. She could spend hours with a stack of books, enjoyed hosting little tea parties, and would quietly engage with her toys while I prepared dinner or tackled my work.

Then came our second child, who is a completely different story.

This one is our untamed spirit, quite literally. It feels like she dropped in from another realm—one where the inhabitants roam freely and have no regard for manners, footwear, or hygiene. Despite our best parenting efforts, she seems bent on embracing her wild side for as long as possible.

Here are 10 signs that you might have a wild child as well:

  1. They Prefer Alternative Modes of Transportation.
    Our middle kid seems to have spent more time galloping on all fours than walking upright. It’s quite impressive, really; she can gallop like a horse or sprint like a cheetah, depending on her mood. Wild kids often prefer crawling, climbing, or hopping over walking like typical humans.
  2. Utensils? What Are Those?
    Forks and spoons? Those are mere suggestions. Our child would happily eat every meal without them. If necessary, she might use her hands, but her preferred method is to dive in with her mouth like a hungry bird. It’s reminiscent of that famous scene from A Christmas Story—yes, that’s my kid!
  3. Dirt is Their Best Friend.
    You wouldn’t believe the joy on my child’s face when she returns from playing outside covered in dirt. She loves to trot around barefoot and the messier she gets, the more thrilled she seems.
  4. Forget the 5-Second Rule.
    Along with avoiding cutlery, wild children are known for consuming anything they drop. Our first child is a germaphobe, refusing to eat anything that has touched a surface. Our wild one, however, will pick up a slice of pizza off the ground, brush off some debris, and munch away without a second thought.
  5. Hair Care? What’s That?
    When it comes to grooming, getting my daughter to brush her hair has been an ongoing struggle. If left to her own devices, she’d let it grow wild until she resembles someone raised in the wilderness.
  6. Their Wardrobe is a Mess.
    The all-fours lifestyle takes its toll. Our daughter loves wearing stretchy pants for freedom of movement, but they don’t hold up well to her antics. And napkins? Those don’t exist in her world. I’ve lost count of how many times I’ve pleaded with her not to wipe her hands on her shirt.
  7. Their Bed Resembles a Nest.
    I’m not sure if my wild child has ever slept normally in her bed. She has a habit of pushing all her blankets and pillows into a circular nest. At nine, she even saved her allowance to buy a large dog bed. Yes, you read that right—we’ve never owned a dog, yet we possess a dog bed.
  8. You Check the Trees First When They’re Missing.
    If I call out for my child and she doesn’t respond, my first instinct is to look outside. More often than not, she’s found perched in our plum tree, engrossed in a book or lost in her imagination. I appreciate her love for nature, though I could do without the dirt she brings back inside.
  9. Sometimes You Wonder if They’re Part Animal.
    When she was three, we gifted her a baby doll, which she promptly named “Horse.” Her fascination with wildlife has been unyielding. She often expresses a longing to have been born a cat or an eagle. As she’s matured, her animal enthusiasm has evolved into a passionate commitment to environmental conservation, which is wonderful—though some of her animal-like behaviors persist.
  10. You’ve Redefined “Free Spirit.”
    Our wild children truly embody the essence of a free spirit, unburdened by societal norms or expectations. While we strive to guide them toward socially acceptable behavior, we also recognize the unique beauty in their natural inclinations. These kids have a deep connection with nature that many of us may never experience, which is pretty remarkable.

It may not be how I would choose to live, but I respect that this is who my child is.

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Summary:

This article humorously explores the traits of children who seem to embrace a wild, untamed nature, contrasting them with more traditionally well-mannered kids. From their preference for alternative movement and disdain for utensils to their love for dirt and nature, these children embody the essence of a free spirit. While parenting a wild child can be challenging, there’s also a unique beauty in their natural tendencies.