As summer rolls in, many families find their college kids returning home for an extended stay. While this can be a joyful reunion, it’s also a prime opportunity to establish some essential boundaries for a smoother cohabitation experience.
Having enjoyed months of independence, you might feel apprehensive about sharing your space again. I remember the first time I encountered the notion of “boundaries.” I was driving, listening to a talk radio show that felt like a free therapy session for those of us who married young and couldn’t afford actual counseling. One day, the host discussed “boundaries,” a concept that was completely new to me.
It was a straightforward idea: “This is your space, and this is mine. Here’s the line you shouldn’t cross!” It seemed simple enough in theory, yet I never thought it would apply to my family dynamics.
My spouse and I tied the knot young, and we never prioritized setting boundaries. We shared everything: our favorite morning brew, various homes, movie snacks, and even the occasional illness. Our lives intertwined so closely that we barely noticed the absence of personal space. When our children arrived, the idea of boundaries didn’t even cross our minds.
However, things became complicated when our kids hit their late teens and early twenties. These are pivotal years when they seek independence and establish their own limits. While this is a crucial part of growing up, it can be quite challenging for parents, especially as we notice them drawing lines in the sand that we may inadvertently cross.
So, I’ve decided to take a proactive approach with a few guidelines to ensure a peaceful summer:
- If you toss your laundry into my washing machine, and it means I have to move my clean clothes to the dryer, please fold them when they’re dry. I promise to do the same for you, and by summer’s end, I’ll likely have folded more laundry than anyone else in the house. (Mom for the win!)
- Should you come home to a quiet house and find the kitchen empty, feel free to whip up your own dinner. I might be out catching up with friends or enjoying some personal time.
- If you rummage through the fridge and don’t find your favorite snacks, don’t hesitate to hit the grocery store. Just leave your receipt on the counter. I tend to skip purchasing those items!
- And one last note: if my bedroom door is closed, it might just be my way of seeking solitude. If you have a disagreement or a pressing discussion topic, consider sending me a text or an email. I promise to read it and respond thoughtfully.
For anyone else who finds themselves acting as a glorified B&B (Bed & Boundaries) this summer, remember: “If you love something, let it go. If it returns, it’s likely your college student.”
For more insights on navigating family dynamics and home life, check out this excellent resource on pregnancy and home insemination. And if you’re interested in exploring self-insemination options, you can find valuable information at this site. Additionally, for a deeper dive into family relationships, consider reading this blog post.
Summary
Establishing boundaries with your college student returning home for summer can lead to a more harmonious living situation. By setting clear expectations regarding chores, meals, and personal space, both parents and children can coexist peacefully and respectfully.