Whenever my closest friend and I find ourselves frustrated with someone or a particular situation, we share a knowing glance and utter the phrase, “I can’t stand people.” When someone consistently annoys us, we might forgive, but we certainly don’t forget. In fact, we keep a running list of those who’ve irritated us or wronged us in some way. And once you find yourself on that list, there’s no escaping it. Sorry, not sorry.
I maintain several of these lists for various aspects of my life—work, parents from school, and even one exclusively for the employees at my internet service provider that drive me up the wall. Although I consider myself fairly patient, there are definitely certain behaviors that will earn you a spot on my “You’re Testing My Patience” list. I take pride in my extensive collection of grievances, and I might just need to invest in a dedicated notebook to keep track of all the offenders. Don’t worry, you’re probably not on my list. Probably. But if you commit any of the following offenses, all bets are off:
- Ringing the doorbell during naptime. Seriously? I’ll remember to repay the favor when your little one finally drifts off after five days of sleeplessness.
- Leaving a public toilet seat wet. Just sit down like the rest of us! No one wants to deal with dampness from your germs. And if you sprinkle, please clean it up.
- Inviting me to a direct sales party. No, I couldn’t care less about your “journey,” and I definitely don’t need a “lipstick system” that lasts for 42 days.
- Sending direct messages to a group of friends. It’s awkward when everyone starts disappearing from the conversation without a word, and it makes you look silly.
- Talking behind my back. If you lack the courage to say something to my face, you can take a seat on my Manure Manifest.
- Not reciprocating playdates. I love having your kids over for snacks while you enjoy a quiet house, but how about you take my kids for an afternoon before I add you to my list?
- Humblebragging. Just no.
- Being fake. I have no time for insincerity. Life is too short for half-truths and drama. If you’re not genuine, you’re at the top of my list.
- Constantly complaining. We get it. Your toddler is throwing tantrums, and your laundry is piled up. Everyone has their struggles, but not everyone needs to vent 63 times a day.
- Paying attention to the Kardashians. If you do, you’re on my list. Sorry, not sorry.
- Supporting Trump. Go ahead and bring up “emails” so I can add you to my already extensive list of Trump supporters. If you haven’t changed your mind yet, we probably shouldn’t be friends.
- Throwing a co-worker under the bus. There’s enough success to go around, and if you’re climbing the corporate ladder by stepping on others, you’ll end up on my list.
- Assuming I’ll watch your kids because I’m a stay-at-home mom. Sure, I’ll help in a pinch, but don’t take my lifestyle for granted.
- Lying. Just don’t. It’ll land you on a special section of my list reserved for those who can’t tell the truth.
- “Replying all” when a simple reply to the sender will suffice. Please, spare us all the inbox clutter.
- Refusing to tip. Just be a decent human being and leave a tip for your server.
- Not reading an entire article before commenting. Anyone who doesn’t take the time to read should be condemned to cleaning toilets for eternity.
Honestly, it’s not that difficult to stay off my list. Just don’t be a jerk, follow basic etiquette, and tip your servers. If you’re interested in more insights on home insemination, check out this resource on pregnancy. And for those looking to boost their fertility, Make a Mom offers valuable supplements. For further engagement, you can also read about our privacy policy.
In summary, avoiding common social faux pas can help keep you off someone’s unwanted list. Be considerate, honest, and respectful, and you should have no trouble maintaining good relationships.