Successfully navigating move-in day involves a mix of careful planning and adaptability. By now, you should have gathered all essential items (check out Target’s handy printable shopping list or Bed Bath & Beyond’s tailored lists for various colleges). It’s also likely you’ve had important discussions about roommates, friendships, campus safety, health, drinking, and yes, S-E-X.
Having helped two kids settle into college across the country, I’ve learned valuable lessons through both triumphs and missteps. We’ve cherished those big days, filled with smiles and memories. You’ll have your own fond recollections too.
Do’s:
- Encourage Pre-Move Communication: Have your child reach out to their roommate via email or social media. This is often when they’ll decide who will bring items like a refrigerator or TV. As a parent, you might be tempted to peek at their roommate’s online profile. Resist the urge to make comments, such as “Wow, he’s a real catch” or “Looks like she enjoys a good party.”
- Arrive Early: If possible, plan to get there at least a day before move-in. This will give you time to pick up any held purchases, make last-minute buys (there will be some, trust me), and explore the campus—if your child is okay with being seen with you.
- Rest Up: Make sure you get plenty of sleep the night before and enjoy a hearty breakfast on moving day. Arriving exhausted will only drain your energy and mood, which isn’t a great first impression for your child’s new roommate.
- Be Prepared: Have printed directions, a move-in schedule, and maps ready to go. Familiarize yourself with this information ahead of time to ensure a smooth process.
- Pack Healthy Snacks: Bring along nutritious snacks and plenty of water. Save the wine for after the hard work is done (water is your best friend for now!).
- Bring Cleaning Supplies: In addition to a small tool kit, pack some paper towels and disinfectant wipes. A quick clean before unpacking will make the room feel fresher. This may be the only thorough cleaning it gets all year!
- Exchange Contact Info: Share contact details with the roommate and their parents for emergencies only—no snooping on your child’s activities!
- Include Family Photos: Send along a couple of small framed photos for their desk or nightstand. They might act indifferent, but once they see their roommate’s pictures, they’ll wish they had some too.
- First Aid Kit: Don’t forget to pack a small first aid kit, complete with pain relievers and a thermometer. They will surely get sick, and from afar, you’ll want to know their temperature every half hour!
- Pack for Comfort: Include earplugs, headphones, and a sleep mask. These items will help them enjoy some peace and quiet, extending the blissful honeymoon phase of college life.
Don’ts:
- Don’t Pack for Them: Involve your child in the packing process so they know what they have and where it is. Even if they call you later asking for help locating something, cherish those calls—they will become fewer as time goes on.
- Avoid Overpacking: Don’t bring their entire wardrobe. College closets are small, and they probably won’t need half of what you think. If you must ship items, arrive early to avoid long lines at the campus post office.
- Let Them Lead: Resist the urge to unpack or decorate their space. This is their chance to establish independence, and they’ll likely rearrange things immediately after you leave.
- Keep the Door Open: Don’t close the door while unpacking, even if you’re dealing with personal items. Use a doorstop to keep it propped open. You’ll be surprised how many neighbors pop by to introduce themselves, which can be a great icebreaker.
- Stay Out of Conflicts: If any issues arise during the move-in process, let your child handle them. They are the ones who will be living with their roommate.
- Bring Tissues, But Stay Strong: Yes, it’s a big milestone for both of you, but it’s also an exciting time filled with opportunities. Celebrate this moment of achievement!
- Capture the Memories: Take plenty of photos and maximize those hugs and kisses—preferably not in front of their new roommate!
- Participate in Orientation: Don’t skip the orientation programs. They may seem dull at times, but they’re a great way to learn about the school and meet other students and parents.
- Send a Care Package: Include a little surprise in their suitcase, and consider sending a care package 4-6 weeks later with their favorite snacks or small gifts—something fun like poker chips or beauty products!
- Don’t Hover: While it’s tempting to check in constantly, give them space to breathe and grow. A quick call or text is fine, but let them manage their own lives—eventually, they’ll be self-sufficient by graduation!