“When Tommy turns three, he’ll be chatting just like Zoe,” he said with a beaming smile, his little voice brimming with confidence.
I paused for a moment, contemplating whether to let that slide—after all, Tommy, who doesn’t have any known disabilities, will likely be speaking well before he hits three. Yet, addressing the fact that he will likely be talking earlier than Zoe would mean diving into the reason for this difference: Down syndrome.
I chuckled at my own hesitation. Disability is a regular topic in our home! With my own hearing impairment and discussions about various disabilities being commonplace, it felt different when it involved Zoe, my younger daughter.
Taking a deep breath, I turned to Tommy, “You know, Tommy, he might start talking before he’s three,” I said. “In fact, he could be chatting away when he’s just two, or even one!” Tommy nodded in that way he does when he wants to appear knowledgeable, even if he doesn’t quite get it. I continued, “Zoe has Down syndrome, sweetheart.” He nodded again, this time with enthusiasm, exclaiming, “Just like my buddy Ethan!” I replied, “Exactly! Zoe has Down syndrome, just like Ethan does. That means both of them have an extra chromosome, a little bit of extra information in their genes. This extra information can influence how they learn and communicate.”
“My friend Ethan talks,” Tommy said. “Yes, honey, he does! Just because both he and Zoe have Down syndrome doesn’t mean they’re the same. He’s Ethan, and she’s Zoe. Just like you and other kids your age—you’re all four years old, but you might like different things, like superheroes or dinosaurs. You can share similarities and still be unique. It’s the same for Ethan and Zoe.”
He nodded, but I could tell I lost him after the mention of superheroes because before I knew it, he was telling me about a girl he likes at preschool who enjoys playing superheroes with him. That’s my boy!
I let the conversation flow naturally, grateful that we were discussing these topics openly. Down syndrome and its implications won’t be something we shy away from; rather, it’s a subject we’re already addressing head-on.
My advice? Be open about disability—any kind of disability, especially those affecting your family. Instead of waiting for the “perfect moment” to address it, incorporate those discussions into everyday conversations. Kids are like little detectives, paying attention to everything—even when you think they’re not. They can sense when you’re not being straightforward, so just share the truth.
Here are some kid-friendly truths about Down syndrome:
- It’s simply an extra chromosome—easy enough to understand!
- Down syndrome varies for each individual; it’s not a one-size-fits-all situation.
- It can affect how a person learns and develops.
- Remember, Down syndrome isn’t something to feel sorrow about. If you view it as tragic, your child will sense that.
So, keep those little antennas in mind during your conversations!
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In summary, discussing Down syndrome with children can be straightforward and beneficial. Emphasizing differences, similarities, and the importance of open communication can foster understanding and acceptance.