If I had a chance to do it all over, I wouldn’t have chosen to become a stay-at-home mom (SAHM). There, I said it.
Let me clarify: when I made the choice 13 years ago to stay home with my first child, it felt like the right decision for our family. We were young and just starting out; it made sense financially for me to manage the household while my husband worked. After years of being in the corporate world, I welcomed the opportunity to slow down and dive into the joys of motherhood.
I stepped away from a rewarding, profitable career, and initially, I didn’t look back. The following years were filled with the everyday challenges of motherhood, long days spent with diapers, bottles, and tantrums. I found joy in raising happy kids, and for a long time, my identity as a mother was fulfilling enough. I focused entirely on my children and pushed aside the nagging doubt that perhaps leaving my career was a mistake. Most of the time, I could silence that voice, burying it deep within my thoughts.
But now things are different.
My kids are older now, aged 10 and 13, which means they require less of my time and attention. The house falls silent after the morning rush, and there’s only so much laundry a person can do to keep busy. As my daughter transitioned to full-time school, I managed to strike a balance by taking on a few freelance projects while remaining available for family needs. I was “working” but still the primary caregiver for school pickups and events.
I was content with this arrangement—until recently. The struggle to balance my roles as a mom and a professional started to intensify. With my writing career gaining momentum and new opportunities emerging, I found myself torn between home responsibilities and my ambitions.
Looking at the dishes piling up and the laundry mountain, I often think, “When is it my turn?” I’ve started to feel frustrated and resentful that my mom duties feel like a weight around my neck. I’m angry at myself for being so devoted that it’s noticeable when household tasks slip. I’m done being just the maid, chef, and chauffeur; I’m ready to reclaim my identity as the CEO of my own life. The kids are capable of doing their own laundry now, and if we have to eat off paper plates for a while, so be it. Things are about to change because this mama has dreams to pursue.
So when do I get to step away from my role as a SAHM and dive back into my career? That time is now.
And I won’t apologize for it.
For thirteen years, I’ve devoted myself to my family. Now, I’m ready to revive my career and breathe new life into it. I refuse to feel guilty for wanting to shift my focus as my kids approach their high school years. Just as I adapted when my youngest started school, I must now accept that I have many more years ahead to chase my dreams and reclaim what I set aside when my children were born.
I will make choices that prioritize my career, without the weight of carpool schedules and school performances pulling me back. I can work longer hours and invest time in projects that inspire me. I can enjoy evenings out with my husband and share engaging stories that don’t revolve around our kids’ schooling.
While I wouldn’t trade the beautiful moments I’ve shared with my children, I can’t help but wonder how I so easily set aside my professional aspirations. I now realize that whatever I pursue in the future will hold much more significance because I understand the effort it takes to reconnect with the person I used to be.
I was once a woman with a fulfilling career and ambitions. I will always cherish my role as a mother, but soon, I will get to rediscover the real me. And I can’t wait.
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Summary
In this article, Sarah Thompson shares her reflections on her journey as a stay-at-home mom and her evolving desire to return to her professional career. After years of focusing solely on motherhood, she finds herself increasingly drawn back to her ambitions as her children grow older. Embracing the necessity of change, she expresses no regrets for wanting to reclaim her identity and pursue her dreams while balancing family life.