Having a child is a surefire way to attract unsolicited advice from every corner of your life. Even before your little one arrives, friends, family, and even strangers feel compelled to share their “sage” wisdom, presenting it as if it were a groundbreaking revelation that will transform your parenting journey.
Have you ever noticed how often this so-called wisdom is about as useful as a screen door on a submarine? You’ve heard it all, and much of what people share tends to be generic platitudes that lack real substance (just take a look at #1). While I typically avoid giving unsolicited advice, if I ever did, it would be something more tailored to real-life parenting challenges.
So, I’ve compiled a list of the gems I’ve received over the years, reinterpreted to reflect the true essence of life with a child:
- It is what it is. But sometimes you’re left in the dark about what “it” actually is. In those moments, I recommend washing your hands if you’ve touched it—trust me!
- Expect the unexpected. And I mean the unexpected surprises. Think you’ve seen it all? Just wait until your child bursts into a public restroom while you’re… well, you get the picture.
- This too shall pass… Gas. Your little one will produce plenty of it (and you might too during pregnancy), and let’s just say, it can clear a room!
- Life goes on… And so do the temper tantrums. Sometimes it feels like they last an eternity—especially when they’re particularly epic.
- Prepare for the worst. Like, the worst version of you. Seriously, when was the last time you had a moment to yourself, or even a shower?
- Hope for the best. The best possible night of sleep, which may still be a stretch.
- Nothing is guaranteed in life… Except for messy diapers. Yep, that’s a certainty!
- What’s yours is mine. Just ask your toddler, who firmly believes everything belongs to them.
- It’s always something. And usually, it’s the most ridiculous reason that sets off the waterworks. Some examples: my daughter cried because she couldn’t see the moon during the day or because she wanted me to take off my glasses (which I wouldn’t do).
- It takes a village to raise a child… If you happen to be in a polygamous situation, that is!
For more insights into parenting and other related topics, check out this other blog post. If you’re navigating the world of home insemination, you might also want to visit this resource for expert advice. Additionally, WebMD offers excellent information on pregnancy and home insemination.
Summary
Navigating parenthood often comes with a barrage of unsolicited advice that can feel more overwhelming than helpful. By transforming common sayings into relatable parenting truths, we can find humor and solidarity in the chaos of raising children, celebrating the ups and downs along the way.