Ten Truths About Motherhood They Won’t Share with You…But I Will

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Eleven years ago, I was completely taken aback by the revelations that hit me the moment I entered the world of motherhood. It felt like the other moms, who seemed to have it all figured out, were snickering in the background while I stumbled through this new chapter. I could almost hear them whispering, “Look at her, poor thing… she just realized she’ll never sleep again,” alongside chuckles about how I believed crunches would restore my pre-baby abs. Sure, I stepped into this role a bit naive, but I can’t be the only one shocked to discover that toddlers have an uncanny ability to watch you in the bathroom. Here’s the lowdown on the ten things “they” won’t tell you.

This list is a culmination of eleven years filled with toddler negotiations, countless trips in a minivan, and a staggering number of sleepless nights. These are the essential truths that could catch you off guard if you’re not prepared.

1. No Mom Has It All Figured Out. Not a single one. Every mother is just winging it, hoping for the best. If you meet a mom who claims to have it all under control, she’s probably not being honest. The only exception? Mom bloggers (wink).
2. You Will Sleep Again, But Not Like Before. You will eventually catch some Z’s, but your sleep will forever be different. You’ll find yourself waking up at the slightest noise, like a supermom with built-in radar for any nighttime disturbances. It’s quite the remarkable phenomenon.
3. Sick Days Are a Myth. Forget about taking a break when you’re feeling under the weather. You’ll be signing school permission slips while battling nausea and organizing events while recovering from surgery. The reality is: your health takes a backseat.
4. Find Your Mom Tribe ASAP. As soon as your little one arrives, connect with other moms who understand. Seek out that one person who allows you to vent without judgment. If she admits she’s clueless too, hold on tight and make her your wine buddy! Call her on rough days, and if she picks up, you’ve found a friend for life.
5. Intimacy Becomes a Task. At times, sex will feel like just another item on your never-ending to-do list. You’ll find yourself squeezing it in between tasks like “Make 25 Unicorn Cupcakes” and “Wash the Dishes.” Prioritize your relationship, because laundry can wait, but connection is vital. And yes, it’s perfectly okay if your mind wanders during those moments — multitasking is our specialty!
6. You Might Not Bond Immediately. When you bring your baby home, it’s entirely possible you won’t feel that instant connection. You’ll love them deeply, but those early days can be overwhelming. Adjusting to your new reality takes time, and it’s okay to feel a little lost. If you’re honest about it, you’ll find camaraderie with others in the same boat.
7. You Will Become a Storyteller. Get ready to weave tales about Santa, the Tooth Fairy, and all things magical. You’ll master the art of storytelling while holding your kids to a standard of honesty. Trust me, start brainstorming hiding spots for that Elf on the Shelf now — you’ll be grateful later.
8. The Market Is Full of Scares. Almost every product out there comes with a warning. From BPA to GMOs, the advice can be overwhelming. Focus on what works for your family and ignore the judgment of others. No one truly has the right answers, so trust your instincts.
9. Lycra Becomes Your Best Friend. After giving birth, your wardrobe will shift dramatically. Goodbye, sexy lace; hello, sturdy support! You’ll embrace yoga pants and anything with an elastic waistband. No more judging others for wearing leggings — you’ll be rocking them, too!
10. You Will Learn as You Go. The moment you meet your child, you’ll start to figure things out. Mistakes? Sure, they’ll happen. But do your best with what you have, and remember that when your kids grow up, they’ll have the chance to raise their own kids however they see fit. Own your “I’m the mommy, and that’s why” mantra proudly.

This list is certainly not exhaustive; I’ve likely missed some key points. But one thing is clear: I won’t be the one snickering behind your back. Instead, I’ll pull you aside, share a comforting truth, and pour you a generous glass of wine to help you navigate this journey.

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Summary

Motherhood is a challenging journey filled with unexpected truths. From the realization that no mom has it all figured out to the importance of finding your tribe, these ten insights will help prepare you for the wild ride ahead. Remember, you’re not alone, and together we can tackle the ups and downs of parenthood.