I genuinely appreciate you. I do! However, I must admit, I’m a bit puzzled by your joy when snow days are announced. You appear to be an everyday person, but the moment school closures are declared, you turn into a beacon of happiness. I’m beginning to think you might not fully grasp what a snow day entails, so allow me to clarify:
When school is canceled, it means the kids are home with you.
If your reaction to this news is still an enthusiastic “Hooray!” I can only conclude one of the following possibilities:
- You’re being playful and sarcastic.
- You have a job outside the home.
- You have a wonderful nanny.
- You possess superior coping mechanisms than I do.
- The kids have restrained you and are responding on your behalf.
I simply can’t fathom any other explanation. To bridge our understanding, let me share why my reaction isn’t “Hooray!” but rather “Oh no!”:
- I don’t want to be a personal chef all day.
- I need to write, and it’s tough to concentrate amidst the chaos of broken toys and sibling squabbles.
- I enjoy my privacy in the bathroom.
- I feel bad if I let my kids binge-watch shows or play video games, but the constant noise can be overwhelming.
- I have to share my snacks, which is a tragedy in itself.
I hope you can see where I’m coming from. And if you can’t relate because you’re busy whipping up hot cocoa for a snow fort, could I possibly drop my kids off at your place? Just for a day, please? (Unless school gets canceled again tomorrow, of course.)
Warm regards,
Megan
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Summary: In this light-hearted letter, a parent expresses their confusion towards those who celebrate snow days while sharing the challenges of being home with children during school closures. The letter humorously highlights the difficulties of parenting while also providing helpful resources on home insemination.