Parenting
When I discovered I was expecting our third child, it was a bit of a shock. On top of that, I felt awful—truly awful. For all nine months, my trusty strawberry-flavored Zofran became my lifeline, helping me navigate each day.
By June, I was more than ready for the pregnancy to be over. I felt enormous, suffered from heartburn at the mere sight of water, and could hardly walk. Surely, things would improve once the baby arrived, right? I fantasized about those peaceful afternoons with a baby snuggled on my chest. I imagined tearing up at the first birthday party, reminiscing about the blissful days of infancy that were all too fleeting.
Then came the moment of birth. I left the hospital with sore, blistered nipples from nursing a hungry, tongue-tied baby. It quickly became clear that he was unlike our previous two calm babies.
Around the two-week mark, our little one began to cry incessantly. Not the gentle whimpers of a newborn, but a piercing scream that could last for hours. He would tighten his small fists, his face would flush red, and the wailing would commence, typically starting between 5 PM and 7 PM and lasting until midnight or later—every single day.
If you’ve never dealt with colic, it’s hard to explain the toll it takes. It can break you. It fills you with irrational anger, a whirlwind of emotions that leaves you exhausted. Even if the daytime hours are relatively quiet, that relentless crying each night can shatter your sense of well-being.
Being someone who tends to take action (often to my own detriment), I wanted to FIX the problem. I believed that if I read enough books, researched extensively, and tried various techniques, I could find a solution. But nothing seemed to work. We would sit in the dark (light and sound only aggravated him), and I would rock him until I could no longer bear it. Sometimes, I found myself crying alongside him. He cried for seven long months.
I was completely overwhelmed by the noise. I feared that someone might report us to child protective services for potential neglect (we lived in a close-knit urban area). I was sleep-deprived and felt completely out of control. I held myself to a standard that, as a mother of three, I should have everything figured out. I felt guilty for not bonding with this baby the way I had with my others.
To be honest, I didn’t particularly like him at first. It was a struggle to meet his needs, and holding him felt more like a chore than a joy. I even resented my husband for being able to leave for work each day.
Finally, around eight months, we decided to take action once more and try sleep training. With renewed determination, we finally found success. Coincidentally, he decided he was finished nursing and opted for a bottle instead. With better sleep and the convenience of formula (which can sometimes be a better choice), I began to see a glimmer of hope.
Now, our little guy is a completely different child. He has blossomed out of his colic and, by his first birthday, had transformed into an absolute joy. He’s become an incredible sleeper with the biggest smile and a goofy personality that keeps his older brothers laughing.
To all the parents out there who are struggling: it does get better. Trust me, it will improve. In the meantime, hold on to your sanity. If you find yourself feeling overwhelmed, gently place your baby in a safe spot and take a moment for yourself. And don’t hesitate to ask for help! If you’re in Seattle, I’d be happy to bring you a meal.
For those looking for support, check out this excellent resource for pregnancy and home insemination: Drugs.com on Female Infertility.
Also, if you want to learn more about navigating your fertility journey, consider visiting Make a Mom for valuable insights. And for more information on home insemination, feel free to reach out through my other blog post here.
Summary:
I shared my experience of surviving a colicky baby, emphasizing the emotional and physical challenges that come with it. I went from feeling overwhelmed and disconnected to finding hope and joy as my child grew. The message is clear: it will get better, and it’s essential to reach out for support during tough times.