When you welcome a little one into your life, you’ll find that everyone suddenly has advice to share. While some nuggets of wisdom come wrapped in gifts or a nice bottle of wine, others can feel downright unhelpful. Here’s a fresh take on the unsolicited advice new moms often hear:
- “Savor every moment.” Honestly, this can be infuriating. It’s as if everyone assumes that new motherhood is a constant vacation. In reality, I was knee-deep in milk stains and sleep deprivation for what felt like an eternity. Sure, I adored my baby, but let’s be real: there were plenty of moments filled with exhaustion and tears. This well-meaning phrase often comes from those who forgot the struggle and want to prevent us from making the same mistake.
- “Make time for yourself.” What a nice thought! But when you’re tethered to a tiny human day and night, finding a moment for self-care seems impossible. Unless the person giving this advice is on their way to babysit, it’s not very practical. Honestly, I used to wonder if I was failing at motherhood because I couldn’t find that elusive “me time.”
- “Don’t feel guilty…” Guilt is an ever-present companion for most new moms. I’ve met so many incredible mothers, but I’ve yet to meet one who has completely escaped guilt. A more useful piece of advice would be, “It’s okay to feel overwhelmed; it takes time to navigate this new role.” Feeling guilty about feeling guilty only adds to the stress. Let’s just acknowledge that we care deeply and that’s perfectly normal.
- “Sleep when the baby sleeps.” This advice is perhaps the most ridiculous of all. Newborns nap for mere minutes at a time, and usually, they’re napping on you. Unless you can magically fall asleep the moment they do, you’re likely just trying to finish that sandwich you started three hours ago.
- “If you’re calm, your baby will be calm.” While it’s true that babies can sense our stress, being calm doesn’t guarantee a serene baby. If it worked that way, I would have spent my days blissfully zen, munching on snacks, and nursing a chill baby. Some infants just have a knack for turning even the most relaxed parents into bundles of nerves.
- “Trust your instincts.” This sounds nice, but it’s a lot to live up to. The idea that we should inherently know how to handle every aspect of parenting can be overwhelming. Instead, a more supportive approach could be, “I understand how daunting this can be; I’m here to help if you have questions.” It’s okay not to have all the answers right away.
For the sake of new moms everywhere, let’s set aside the cliché advice and focus on what truly matters: lending a helping hand. If you’re looking for more insightful tips on home insemination or parenting, check out this great resource for more information, and don’t forget to visit Make A Mom for expert advice on home insemination kits. Additionally, for those navigating the complexities of pregnancy, this resource offers excellent support.
In summary, new motherhood is a complex journey filled with challenges and joys. Instead of offering tired clichés, let’s provide real support and understanding to those embarking on this adventure.