Potty training! If you’re looking for a way to transform your life into a delightful, albeit chaotic, adventure, hop back onto that potty training journey! (And let’s be honest, there’s probably a past potty training mishap lurking in your history. How do I know? Just a hunch.) Here are some clever replies to the well-intentioned friends, family, and even random strangers who feel compelled to inquire about your potty training progress…
- “My kid was fully trained by 18 months!” Oh, really? I was busy teaching my little one French and how to play the ukulele at that age.
- “Have you considered going diaper-free?” Sure! Have you ever tried to scrub poop out of a fabric couch?
- “When she’s ready, she’ll just do it!” Exactly! And when she can trade it for a pony and a gaming console, she’ll be ready too.
- “Have you thought about a sticker chart?” Oh, absolutely! Every time I manage not to lose my mind before noon, I get to choose my favorite superhero sticker.
- “Have you tried elimination communication?” Totally! When my spouse takes our time machine for a spin, I’ll just zip back to her newborn days and give it a shot.
- “Have you used M&M’s as a reward?” Have you seen my waistline?
- “Preschool will really help!” Awesome! Just curious, how much do you pay the teachers to clean up messes from your floors?
- “She’ll learn from her older sister!” That’s a good one! That only works for picking up the occasional curse word.
- “Pull-ups worked wonders for my son!” If your child thinks a Pull-up is just like real underwear, you might want to consider enrolling them in a genius program.
- “It will get easier!” Sure, especially if you bring over some cleaning supplies and a few cocktails to ease the process.
So, when you have those well-meaning relatives over for dinner, make sure to keep these snappy comebacks in mind. And just a tip: the aroma of a freshly baked apple pie does a decent job of masking any lingering odors. So, toss that store-bought pie in the oven and set it to 350. You’re totally welcome! Happy cooking!
If you want to explore more about parenting, check out this insightful post on home insemination. And for those curious about the science of fertility, Make A Mom is a great resource. Additionally, Healthline offers excellent information on pregnancy and its related topics.
In summary, potty training can be a wild ride filled with unsolicited advice. These playful comebacks can help you navigate the well-meaning questions with humor while you tackle this challenging phase of parenting.