As a mom, I like to see myself as a protective mama bear—not so much a tiger or an elephant, but perhaps just your average, dedicated mule mom. My goal is to find the right balance, but with the demands of special lunches, family outings, and the challenge of nurturing strong, independent daughters, there are some lessons that would have been beneficial to learn sooner. In today’s world, where comparisons run rampant, here are six things I wish I could have grasped earlier about raising girls:
1. Fashion Trends
When it comes to clothing for your daughters after those cute onesies and before they don their first business suits, be prepared for an onslaught of fashion that may not align with your taste. Expect to see groin-grazing, sparkly pants with phrases like “Angel” or “Party” on the back. You may try to counter this with longer shirts, but your daughter will inevitably find a way to cinch them at the waist. You’ll hear other parents lament about how girls are dressing today, while you just hope for something comfortable and modest.
2. Breaking Gender Norms
In your quest to promote gender neutrality, you might avoid the stereotypical pink and purple toys, opting instead for eco-friendly options like handmade dolls. However, these beautiful creations might look more like rustic critters compared to the shiny, expensive toys that her friends have. You’ll find yourself navigating tricky conversations about why their dolls don’t come with matching outfits—for instance, “But mom, the ones from the store have matching clothes for me and my doll!”
3. The Disney Phenomenon
No matter how hard you try, Disney princesses will infiltrate your life. You won’t escape the charm of characters like Snow White or Sleeping Beauty, especially when family and friends shower your little one with princess-themed gifts. Embrace it! Just remember to appreciate characters like Pocahontas, who, despite her mini leather dress, actually embodies strength and resilience.
4. Empowering Role Models
Instilling a sense of girl power will be a part of your daily life. From movies to books to activism, you’ll want to introduce your daughters to empowering female figures. You’ll cheer for pop icons like Beyoncé and Taylor Swift, even if you end up explaining their sometimes risqué performances. Just remember, it’s all part of the journey!
5. The Importance of Voice
You’ll read about the issues of uptalking and vocal fry and may find yourself correcting your daughters every time they phrase a statement as a question. You want them to assert their opinions confidently. But then, at a parent-teacher conference, you might find that the teacher is a master of both uptalking and vocal fry herself. Irony, anyone?
6. Music and Lyrics
At some point, your daughter will sing lyrics that refer to subjects you’d rather she didn’t know about yet. You might not know where she picked them up, and you’ll face a choice: do you pull the car over for an awkward conversation or just jam along? If you choose the latter, you might discover that embracing the fun of the music can be just as bonding.
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In summary, parenting daughters is a journey filled with unexpected lessons and delightful surprises. Embrace the chaos, and remember that each experience shapes them into the strong women they will become.