10 Surprising Similarities Between Water Parks and Bars

With summer in full swing, finding exciting ways to keep the kids entertained (and tire them out) becomes a priority. And let’s be honest: if you can catch a tan along the way, that’s just a sweet bonus. Enter water parks.

Amidst the splashes and the inevitable foot fungus, water parks offer a fantastic escape for the kiddos while giving you a chance to unwind, even if it’s only for a brief moment with your book. As a child, I cherished my visits to these aquatic playgrounds—the thrilling slides and tasty snacks were enough to elicit pure joy. Sure, it can hit the wallet hard, but isn’t a little financial sacrifice worth it for a break from the everyday grind?

As an adult, my perspective has shifted. Instead of just enjoying the wave pools and slides, I can’t help but think about the potential hazards and, yes, the occasional unsettling water quality. Recently, I reminisced about my childhood visits and realized that trips to water parks mirror late-night outings to bars during my 20s. While they may seem worlds apart, I’ve experienced both extensively and can confidently share the ten ways they are more alike than you might think.

1. Bathroom Avoidance

Whether at a water park or a bar, stepping barefoot into the restrooms is a no-go. The floors are usually a mix of unspeakable substances, and you’ll inevitably find a discarded Band-Aid or two lying around.

2. Inappropriate Attire

From questionable swimwear choices to overly revealing club outfits, both settings boast their fair share of fashion faux pas. One thing’s for sure: you’ll likely catch a glimpse of some skin—perhaps too much.

3. The Male Gaze

Whether it’s sunbathers or bar patrons, there’s typically a crowd of guys eyeing the ladies. It’s just how it is—skin is on display, and there’s always a chance of an accidental wardrobe malfunction.

4. Getting Toasted

At the water park, it’s the sun that leaves you red and sore, while at the bar, it’s the cocktails that have you regretting those extra shots. Both can lead to a painful aftermath, whether from sunburn or a hangover.

5. Pricey Eats and Drinks

Expect to fork over way more cash for snacks and beverages than you would anywhere else. But hey, we all know you’ll pay it anyway.

6. The Wristband Ritual

Upon entry, you’re adorned with a wristband that signifies your status as a paying guest. Sadly, it’s often a flimsy paper bracelet that’s doomed to bleed color the moment you spill that first overpriced drink.

7. Questionable Music

Whether it’s a cringe-worthy cover band or an overly peppy radio station, the soundtrack at both venues is rarely enjoyable. Your foot-tapping is more about keeping your balance than jamming out.

8. Tears and Tantrums

Be it a squabble over the next slide or who’s footing the drink bill, emotions run high in both places. It’s a guarantee that someone will leave in tears.

9. Bad Hair Days

Whether it’s water-induced frizz or sweat from the dance floor, you’re likely to leave both venues with hair that could use some serious TLC.

10. Buddy System

Both locations are way more fun with a friend. You need that wingwoman to help navigate the chaos and remind you of the unspoken rules of engagement.

Convinced? You might just find yourself packing your bag for a day at the park or a night out. Or, you could always opt for a cozy night in with Netflix. At least there, wardrobe malfunctions are a non-issue!

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In summary, water parks and bars may seem like entirely different worlds, but they share striking similarities that can make for a fun and chaotic experience. From overpriced snacks to the inevitable drama, both locales offer a unique blend of entertainment and adventure. Whether you’re splashing in the sun or sipping cocktails, there’s always a story to tell.