There are few sweeter phrases a parent can hear than, “Mom, can I get some underwear for my birthday?” It made me laugh, but my daughter, Lucy, was completely serious.
Last year, when she entered eighth grade, my 13-year-old proposed a bold plan: a single allowance of $100 to cover her entire school year. With excitement and determination, she crafted a contract, and after some thoughtful discussion, both of us signed it.
Lucy felt wealthy for precisely eight weeks, only to find herself in a tight spot for the remaining eight months. However, her experience during those months turned out to be incredibly valuable. Here’s what she discovered:
- The Art of Hustling: Lucy quickly embraced the idea of earning money. Babysitting became her go-to job, and she eagerly sought out every opportunity that came her way.
- Creativity at Its Best: Instead of spending money, Lucy opted for free activities with friends. During the holidays, she crafted homemade gifts or purchased second-hand items. These thoughtful presents were cherished even more than store-bought ones.
- Understanding Frugality: When faced with high costs, Lucy made conscious choices. She decided against buying a yearbook and skipped fast-food trips, preferring home-cooked meals. Even when the eighth-grade trip to New York City loomed, she hesitated because it would deplete her cash reserves. Ultimately, she took on babysitting duties alongside me to fund the trip. Although she didn’t buy many souvenirs, she created lasting memories.
- Gaining Independence: With newfound responsibility, Lucy showed a boost in confidence. Working hard for her trip to New York, she sometimes asked me to leave so she could take charge of the babysitting. It was a proud moment for me.
- Cultivating Gratitude: The shift was immediate. Anytime I bought her something, even a simple can of soup, Lucy expressed immense joy. For Christmas, she asked for running shoes and tall boots—items I would have purchased regardless. However, her sense of ownership made those gifts feel special.
- Finding Peace: Our shopping trips transformed. No longer did she plead for every cute dress or trendy accessory. Instead, we enjoyed browsing together, weighing the pros and cons of each purchase. Occasionally, she still tries to charm me: “Please, Mom, I’ll pay you back!” It’s challenging to resist her requests, but my husband often reminds me to “stay strong.”
- The Budgeting Queen: While “queen” may be a stretch, Lucy keeps a detailed ledger. She tracks her income and expenses, allocating 10% to charity, 20% to savings for college, and keeping 70% for personal use. Websites like The Mint can help kids manage their finances too.
As Lucy transitioned into high school, her allowance increased. Despite this, we still support her with necessary expenses, like an iPad or athletic fees. However, there’s a notable difference in our interactions. When she needs something, she asks respectfully rather than demanding it.
Recently, she spent her entire savings on a lovely dress and matching shoes for a semi-formal event, and she felt it was worth every penny—what matters most is that she made that choice herself. After a busy week of school and sports, she’s now babysitting again and has even lined up a summer job to earn extra cash. I sometimes worry that she is taking on too much responsibility, longing for her to enjoy a more carefree teenage life. But is that just the typical concern of an American mother?
Our family life is far from perfect, with routines constantly adjusted. Still, the $100 allowance worked well because Lucy initiated the idea and committed to it wholeheartedly.
And yes, she did receive those underwear for her birthday—and she was genuinely happy!
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Summary
Lucy’s experience with a $100 annual allowance taught her valuable life lessons, including the importance of hard work, creativity, gratitude, and financial responsibility. The journey has fostered independence and improved our shopping dynamics, leading to a more peaceful family environment.