As a parent who spends their days juggling kids, chaos, and countless responsibilities, I’ve shared many laughs—and complaints—with fellow stay-at-home parents (SAHPs) at the park. It turns out that our experiences and frustrations are remarkably similar. So, to help our partners maintain a harmonious family life (because when the SAHP is content, everyone benefits), here’s a guide on what not to say.
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“Wow, it’s a bit messy in here.”
Really? I’ve tidied up the place three times today! Those toy trains have been put away and pulled out multiple times, and I’ve used part of my precious nap time just to clean. Instead of commenting on the mess, how about you grab a cloth and help tidy up while keeping the kids entertained? I’ll be over here catching a breather. -
“What did you do all day?”
If a fellow SAHP asks, I might joke and say “nothing,” but that doesn’t mean I’ve been lounging around. When you ask, it leaves me at a loss for words. How can I explain the endless rounds of pretend play with trains or princesses? Oddly, the kids seem glued to their screens when you’re around—what’s up with that? -
“You’re raising your voice a lot.”
Seriously? Try wrangling toddlers while repeating “Let’s put on your shoes!” only to find out there’s an accident, and then you’re chasing a giggling child who’s suddenly gone rogue. After a day of this, I think it’s understandable if my patience wears thin by evening. -
“I just need 10 minutes to unwind after work.”
Oh, really? How about you take a detour on your way home and grab some “me” time? Until the kids are asleep, silence is a luxury I can’t afford. -
“Did you really not get those __________ today?” (Fill in the blank: snacks, cleaning supplies, etc.)
You mean the items you could have picked up on your way home or during lunch? Please don’t follow this with “What did you do all day?” because no, I didn’t take my little tornado to the store for dish soap. But hey, the kids are alive—so be a grown-up and grab the item yourself tomorrow. -
“You should take a break. Hire a babysitter.”
Absolutely, I could use a breather, but I was managing just fine until you called to say you’d be late, and that’s when the chaos hit the fan. It’s not about needing a sitter; it’s about planning better on your end! -
“When’s the last time you showered?”
Just don’t even go there. -
“You just need to make it a game.”
Oh, sure! Because turning a toddler tantrum into a game will magically solve everything. If only it were that easy! By the end of the day, I’m ready to forgo games and just get the kids to bed. -
“Um… do you think you need a haircut?”
Funny how I haven’t had time to even check myself out in the mirror. How about you schedule that for me, including finding a sitter?
Feel free to add your own suggestions for the well-being of SAHPs below. My child just discovered a box of matches—time to go!
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In summary, being a stay-at-home parent comes with its unique challenges and quirks. Avoiding these common questions can help maintain a supportive atmosphere at home.