As my daughter Emma approaches her tenth birthday, I find myself reflecting on the important lessons I hope to share with her. It’s as if I’m trying to imprint these values in her heart, like stamping a design into soft clay. While I know I can’t control her beliefs, I can consistently express them, model them, and write them down.
- Your Happiness is Not Your Responsibility. It’s not your job to ensure that those you love—me, your dad, your brother, or your friends—are always happy. It’s a tough reality, but you simply can’t make everyone else happy.
- Stay Fearless in Your Physicality. Keep engaging with the world through movement: run, jump, climb, and throw! Watching you dash across the soccer field or swing confidently on monkey bars fills me with joy. Embrace these activities; they build both your health and self-esteem.
- Embrace Your Passions. Don’t shy away from what you love, even if it feels embarrassing at times. If someone teases you for enjoying something, they aren’t a true friend. This realization is essential as you navigate relationships.
- It’s Okay to Have Different Opinions. You’re old enough to voice your thoughts, and I genuinely want to hear them. While it’s important to pick your battles wisely, don’t hesitate to express when you think I’m mistaken. Your views matter, and I promise to listen.
- You Are Incredibly Beautiful. The blend of my features and your father’s creates a unique and stunning individual. As societal standards of beauty loom large, remember that your true beauty shines from within.
- Keep the Love for Reading Alive. Reading is one of my greatest joys, and I’m thrilled to see you share that passion. The feeling of getting lost in a story, of connecting with characters, is a treasure that stays with you throughout life.
- You Are Your Own Person. While we share similarities, you are entirely your own individual. I recognize that part of growing up is separating from me, and while that can be daunting, I want you to know I’ll always be here for you. Our bond may stretch, but it will grow even stronger.
- Most Actions Aren’t About You. When others behave in ways that hurt you, it’s usually a reflection of their inner struggles rather than a commentary on you. I know this can be hard to accept, but keep in mind that everyone has their own battles.
- No One Can Be Everything for You. Be cautious about relying too heavily on any one person for your emotional fulfillment. Loneliness is a common feeling, and trying to fill that void with others can lead to disappointment. I’m learning to embrace this feeling, and I hope to guide you in doing the same.
- I’m Always Trying My Best. I know I don’t always get it right. I can be impatient and I raise my voice at times. However, my love for you and your brother is boundless. I wish I could be the perfect parent, but know that my love is unwavering, no matter what.
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In summary, as you grow, embrace your individuality, pursue your passions, and remember that my love for you is unconditional. Life will present challenges, but you have the strength to navigate them.
