It struck me unexpectedly last week while I was at the local swimming pool, observing my kids as they played. I took a moment to truly see them. My eldest was splashing around with her friends, her limbs moving gracefully through the water. My youngest was confidently leaping off the diving board like a pro, while my son was in the shade, sharing laughter with his pals. As I sat there sipping my lukewarm coffee, it hit me: I’m exactly where I need to be.
But let me rewind for a moment. The day before had been quite challenging. I woke up with the intent of making it a wonderful day, determined to avoid going to bed replaying my parenting missteps, as has often been the case. I committed to being an attentive, compassionate mom, balancing firmness with kindness. I didn’t raise my voice or get distracted by my phone. I was on my game all day, and frankly, it was exhausting.
Of course, that very day, my children decided to turn our home into an arena of chaos, bickering with each other constantly. I thought ordering pizza would salvage the evening, but it turned into a disaster. Have you ever experienced a day that spiraled out of control like that? It felt unbearable.
Yet, the next morning at the pool, I realized:
- Those are my healthy and beautiful kids right there.
- I’m not stuck in the baby pool, pretending it’s not grimy.
- I haven’t changed a diaper in over a year.
- We haven’t had to remind anyone not to drink the pool water this summer.
- I can use the bathroom alone (nearly half the time).
- They’re becoming more independent and (occasionally) helpful.
- They still want my presence and affection.
- I can receive hugs and snuggles whenever I desire.
- They’re big enough to take out the trash.
I’m in the sweet spot of parenthood.
I took a moment to let this realization sink in. After years of feeling trapped in the whirlwind of parenting—nights filled with interrupted sleep and days dictated by nap times, diaper changes, and school pick-ups—I’ve started to notice a shift. The blur is beginning to sharpen, and I’m seeing things more clearly.
Everyone was right; this phase really does fly by. When my children were younger, the days felt interminable, and my world seemed small and sometimes lonely. Each hour stretched endlessly, especially the one before my husband got home from work. But those moments were also filled with the sweet scent of their baby heads and their tiny, kissable toes—now grown and a bit stinky. They have transformed from being an extension of me to their own remarkable individuals.
Now, here I am, with three kids who are no longer little, but not entirely grown either. I find myself in this precious phase, both grateful and a bit anxious. I wish this moment could last longer. Can time just slow down a bit? I didn’t even realize we were in this sweet spot until it was almost halfway over. What’s on the horizon? Social media, puberty, curfews—the typical adolescent trials. I’m not quite ready for that. Can’t we just linger here a little longer?
The day passed as I reflected on this sweet spot, and my perspective on the previous day’s chaos shifted. Looking back, the pizza incident became a humorous memory. That evening, I had a heartfelt conversation with my children about how they felt about our summer so far. My son excitedly shared a lesson from his swim team about the importance of pushing off the wall and gliding before taking that first stroke. He animatedly acted it out, then suddenly froze, arm raised, face turned to the ceiling.
Then he resumed his movements, exclaiming, “DID YOU SEE THAT? THAT WAS THE SWEET SPOT! WHEN YOU TURN YOURSELF AND LOOK AND BREATHE REAL DEEP. IF YOU DO THE SWEET SPOT JUST RIGHT YOU SET YOURSELF UP TO BE COMPLETELY AWESOME!” (My son has a knack for being loud). He noticed my tears and asked, “MOM, WHAT’S WRONG? YOU LOOK CONSTIPATED!”
I shared with him my thoughts about our current sweet spot as a family. He looked at me with a mixture of confusion and understanding. “There’s a sweet spot in baseball too,” I mentioned, hoping to engage him further. His eyes lit up. “It’s when the bat hits the ball perfectly! Everything aligns just right, and the ball flies away! You know what I mean?” They nodded, recalling the sound of a well-struck ball.
By this point, I was left to ponder alone in the kitchen, swallowing back my tears.
It’s okay that this sweet spot is fleeting. That’s how it’s meant to be. It serves a purpose, guiding us to prepare for what comes next. We have to align ourselves as best we can for the future, so our kids can navigate their paths with confidence.
Raising children, much like mastering a sport, requires a blend of luck, faith, and daily effort. And if we do it right, they won’t just leave; they’ll soar. All we can hope is to set them up to be truly amazing.
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Summary:
This reflective piece captures the bittersweet nature of parenthood as the author realizes she is in a cherished phase with her growing children. Despite the chaos and challenges, she acknowledges the beauty of their current independence, love, and the fleeting moments that make this time special.