George Bernard Shaw famously said, “Youth is wasted on the young.” While I can appreciate that sentiment, I wouldn’t go so far. My late teens and 20s had their share of fun, but they also included many tearful nights. Sure, Hollywood might say I’ve passed my prime, but let’s be honest—seeking validation from Hollywood is highly overrated.
What I cherish most about being in my 40s is shedding the need for external approval. Do I care about how I look? Absolutely. But it’s no longer about being deemed attractive; it’s about understanding how my self-presentation affects my treatment by others and my own self-esteem.
As I approach my 42nd birthday, I realize I’m still very much the same person I was at 32 and 22. The real change lies in my perspective and how my body responds to the world. The narratives around death and insignificance in our 40s are, quite frankly, exaggerated.
I bristle at the notion of looking good for my age; instead, I revel in the fact that I look good for me. If someone interprets that as a justification for being “past my prime,” that says more about them than it does about me. A few years back, I listened to Clara Jones, a brilliant journalist, respond to the question, “Don’t you feel marginalized at your age?” She simply cocked her head, smiled, and said, “By whom? Who’s marginalizing me?” It wasn’t her celebrity that empowered her; it was her self-definition and confidence.
My 40s have finally brought me the facial contours I’ve always desired. The round cheeks I once disliked are gone, replaced by a face that tells a story of laughter and resilience. No longer do I squeeze into clothes that restrict my 70 inches of height. I embrace it all; the crow’s feet and the “11” lines around my eyes only enhance the woman I’ve become—someone I genuinely love.
Running my own business, I often encounter people who might underestimate me simply because I’m a woman. Yet, my 40s have given me the confidence to confront them head-on. In my stylish wedge shoes or oxblood cowboy boots, I stand tall and assertive, combining confidence with the wisdom I’ve gained.
The sharp lines of my cheekbones catch the light beautifully, and I find joy in the way my features harmonize. I swing between heavy mascara and going completely natural, intrigued by how my mood influences my choices each day.
The essence of my happiness is not tied to how I look; rather, it’s rooted in the peace I feel within. I’ve learned that desiring objects doesn’t equate to happiness. Did we even seek peace in our 20s? Back then, life was all about the chaos and noise.
Being in my 40s means asserting myself in every aspect of life—personally, professionally, and sexually. It’s about belting out tunes in the car and getting my hands dirty in the garden. I feel as though I’m living at the very core of existence, bridging my past and future, both equally vibrant.
The biggest surprise of my 40s? I had no idea just how much I would look forward to this stage of life.
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Summary:
In our 40s, we often discover a newfound confidence and self-acceptance that transcends societal standards of beauty and youth. Embracing our unique journeys allows us to assert ourselves in every area of life, from personal to professional. This decade can be filled with joy, growth, and a deeper understanding of what truly makes us happy.