Let’s face it: my kids are a little on the crazy side. My sons, in particular, seem to take the cake. I can’t help but think it’s their dad’s influence—I certainly never set a field ablaze as a child. Just saying!
Here are some telltale signs that you, too, may be nurturing a Wild One:
- When searching for your little explorer, your gaze naturally drifts upward. You’ve checked the tables, counters, shelves, and even the top of the fridge. Ground-level searching is for calmer kids than yours.
- The only expert at defeating childproof locks is your child. You could wrestle with one for an eternity, cursing under your breath, but Junior can crack it open in a flash—3.2 seconds, to be exact.
- You’ve found yourself sprinting down the sidewalk after a half-dressed toddler, trying to outpace him to the street—all while barefoot in winter and nursing another baby.
- The phrase, “Mom, look!” sends a chill down your spine. That eye twitch? You might not shake it until your child is grown—if then.
- When your child says, “Mom… you better come see this…”, all you can think is, “Oh no… not again. Can’t it be Dad’s turn this time?”
- You hear your partner shout, “WHAT IN THE NAME OF ALL THAT IS HOLY DID YOU DO?!” and you pretend to be asleep, hoping to avoid dealing with the latest disaster.
- You’ve spotted your child on the porch, singing to the neighbors—completely naked.
- The staff at the emergency room knows your child’s name so well that you can predict who will be on duty when you arrive—and you’re often spot on.
- Silence in your home isn’t a sign of peace; it’s a cause for alarm.
- When you call the doctor’s office, they recognize your voice and automatically direct you to the wound treatment area—even if you’re just there for a cough.
- “Yes, it’s a bungee cord, but no, it won’t save you from hitting the ground if you leap off the roof,” you explain, trying to reason with your daredevil.
- You’ve had to Google how to remove dried toothpaste from walls, baby oil from carpets, or Sharpie marks from the ceiling.
- You’ve contemplated using a backpack leash for your child—inside the house.
- Your spouse, when heading to the park with the kids, announces, “Mom’s with us today, so take it easy, okay?”
- While considering new flooring options, your thoughts drift to pricing gym mats.
Navigating life as the mom of a “wild child” is no easy feat, but at least boredom is never an issue! If you’re interested in exploring pregnancy options, check out this helpful resource on donor insemination here. Also, for those looking into home insemination, visit Intracervical Insemination to stay in the loop. And don’t forget to check out Cryobaby Home Intracervical Insemination Syringe Kit Combo for quality products.
In summary, if you find yourself nodding along to these signs, congratulations! You’re likely raising a spirited little one. Embrace the chaos; it’s all part of the adventure!