As I prepared for my wedding, my dad imparted a simple yet profound piece of advice about marriage: “Set aside 20 minutes each day to truly focus on one another. Regardless of how hectic life gets, carve out that time for each other.” It took a moment to sink in, but I instantly recognized the truth in his words.
I had witnessed how chaotic weeks could create distance between us, even when we were physically together. There were nights when we’d finally crawl into bed after a whirlwind of a day. It was often only then, after hours of screens and stress, that we’d pause, look at each other, and realize how disconnected we had been. Those moments of genuine connection, when we could simply say “Hi!” made everything clearer. Too many of those disconnected days left me feeling somewhat unfulfilled.
Conversely, I also cherished the quality of our relationship during vacations when our focus was solely on enjoying each other’s company. Whether stuck in an airport or on a long drive, I found joy in the simplicity of just being together. It was in those quiet, screen-free moments, when we would hug and breathe deeply, that I felt a true connection.
My dad’s advice rang true, but like any curious child, I had to dig deeper with questions. “Would having dinner together count?” I asked. “No, that time should be just for the two of you,” he replied. “What if we can’t manage 20 minutes?” I wondered aloud. “Then aim for 15, or even 10. Just remember, it’s better than nothing.” I was relieved to hear that even a smaller commitment could be beneficial. “Thanks, Dad, I see how this could make a difference.”
Now that many of my friends are stepping into marriage, I’m sharing my father’s wisdom with them. It seems to resonate; everyone pauses to reflect before understanding its significance. They’ve taken it upon themselves to pass this advice along, and I hope it reaches even more couples. Perhaps this straightforward idea can strengthen a marriage or at least encourage partners to dedicate 20 minutes to truly see and connect with one another.
For those interested in exploring the journey of parenthood, you might find valuable insights in related articles on resources like Mount Sinai and this helpful guide on home insemination. Also, if you’re looking for more tips on this topic, check out our other blog for additional information.
In summary, my father’s advice about dedicating time to each other in marriage has proven invaluable. By fostering connection, couples can navigate the busyness of life and strengthen their bonds.