Not that they aren’t lovely! They absolutely are. They possess a certain perfection. But let’s face it: that kind of self-awareness and constant pursuit of being “just right” can’t compare to the joy of splashing in the waves while sporting a tankini bottom that might just fall down, filled with pebbles and the chaos of life. Here are five individuals I’m glad not to be while soaking up the sun:
- The Awkward Teen: Whether skinny, curvy, or somewhere in between, these teens often tug at their swimsuits, seemingly oblivious to their own radiant, sand-covered beauty. I want to shout, “Look at your bodies! They’re meant for movement, laughter, and all the wild adventures life has to offer.” They should embrace their vitality instead of worrying about perfection—something I wish we could all remember.
- The Grad Student Duo: Picture this: a couple deeply engrossed in their matching editions of Gramsci’s Prison Notebooks. Really? Even a light beach read like The Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants seems too ambitious for the sandy shore. For me, the ultimate beach activity is dozing off with the ink from a half-read New Yorker column imprinted on my cheek.
- The New Parent in the Nursing Tent: Sitting alone in a hot, fly-infested nursing tent, this parent is nursing a tiny baby in a soggy swim diaper, desperately wishing for an iced coffee. Oh, sweet friend! I’ve been in your shoes. Just take that baby back to the cool comfort of your motel room, lie down on a clean bed, and indulge in some HGTV. The beach will still be there when your little one is older.
- The Kale Salad Enforcer: Picture a mom trying to feed her son a kale salad while he holds up his sandy hands as if under arrest. Don’t get me wrong; I whip up healthy meals at home, too! But at the beach? That’s not the time for fermented beets when we could be enjoying Lay’s New York Reuben potato chips instead. And honestly, if I won the million-dollar Lay’s potato chip contest, I might rethink my whole writing career!
- The Towel-Wrapper: There’s always that person who wraps a towel around her waist, trying to hide her (beautiful!) legs. I’ve done the same, but let me tell you: it’s liberating to embrace your flaws as you age. At 40 or even 46, I’ve learned that my dimpled thighs aren’t the main event—most people aren’t even paying attention! And as for my kids? They might cringe, but their opinions aren’t really my concern. The one who matters is right here, appreciating me as I am.
I once felt sorry for women like me: a bit hairy, carefree, with snacks flying out of my mouth and sunscreen smudged all over my legs. Who knew that reaching middle age would unlock the key to true beach happiness?
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Summary
This article reflects on the joy of embracing imperfections while enjoying the beach, contrasting the carefree attitude of middle age with the self-consciousness of youth and parental responsibilities. It encourages readers to appreciate their bodies and find happiness in their unique beach experiences.