Scheduling a massage is a rare treat for me; I manage to do it just a couple of times a year. Carving out time for myself proves to be a challenge. I often feel that I shouldn’t indulge in “me time” unless everything is perfectly aligned: the stress level must be low, projects must be completed, and life has to be going smoothly. I’ve conditioned myself to view this break as a reward for when everything seems to be under control. But honestly, who am I kidding? The perfect circumstances never truly exist. There’s always something nagging at me.
For me, stress manifests physically, and I’m sure many can relate to the parts of their bodies where tension accumulates. My massage therapists, though different each time, seem to instantly locate “my knot” — typically in my upper back or right shoulder. I can’t help but turn this painful spot into a running joke, labeling it with names like my “You Haven’t Completed That Work Project Yet” knot or my “You’re Not the Best Parent” knot. No matter how I label it, that knot isn’t my ally. Every therapist seems determined to eliminate it as if it were their personal mission.
But can we ever truly escape that knot, that persistent reminder of our stress? I doubt it. When they work on it, it hurts. Each press feels like they’re jabbing at an old bruise or an open wound.
And then comes the inevitable moment at the end of the session, when the therapist says, “I’ll be right outside while you get dressed. Take your time.” Wouldn’t it be more honest if she just said, “As you get dressed, remember all the stressful things you’ve been trying to forget for the past hour”? If only I could prevent those thoughts from flooding back immediately, that would be fantastic — but it never happens.
So, how do I handle these “knots” in my daily life without a massage therapist on speed dial? Do I procrastinate to sidestep them? Yes, guilty as charged. Do I wish my knots away? Absolutely. Do I confront some of my knots directly before they escalate into bigger issues? Occasionally, but probably not with the fervor of a massage therapist.
This avoidance doesn’t stop at just massages. I also skip reading for enjoyment, binge-watching new series, and even writing in my free time after the kids are asleep.
This is not okay. I’ve learned to believe that I can only take time for kindness and self-love when everything is perfectly in order. What a misconception! Life is always going to be a bit chaotic, and stressors will always be present.
I aspire to find a way to be gentler with myself, to tackle tasks with determination, and not be overly sensitive. If I reflect deeply, I can gather some wisdom that I need to embrace:
- The knots will always be there. Life isn’t simple or perfect, and I can’t simply wish them away.
- Perseverance involves accepting my knots and navigating through them. Sometimes they just stick around, and I must prioritize joy over the burdens.
- And honestly, what could be more stress-relieving than treating myself kindly? It seems so clear, doesn’t it?
If a dedicated massage therapist is willing to fight my knots, shouldn’t I learn to manage them too before they manifest in my shoulders?
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Summary:
In a world filled with stressors, finding time for oneself often takes a back seat. The author shares her personal battle with the physical manifestations of stress, known as “knots,” and the importance of prioritizing self-care. Despite the chaos of life, it’s essential to be kinder to oneself and acknowledge that knots are a part of existence. Embracing self-love and taking time to unwind can lead to a more balanced life.