Reflections on Time and Age

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Recently, while flying to Chicago for a reunion with my old friends, I had an unexpected encounter that left me pondering the passage of time. A young woman in her twenties, with a bright smile and flawless complexion, referred to me as “Ma’am.” In that moment, I was taken aback. The term felt like a relic from a different era, a reminder of how perceptions of age can shift.

Back in grad school, I was among the older students, yet no one called me “Ma’am.” Now, years later, this young woman seemed to see me as part of a different realm—one that felt distinctly older. “Excuse me, Ma’am,” she said, as she navigated past me to her window seat, with an air of gentleness as if she expected my age to render me fragile. It was a stark contrast to the vibrant classmates I had back in school, many of whom were embarking on their professional journeys, while I was starting anew, having left behind a career as an entertainment lawyer.

Reunion with the Dowagers

During that reunion with my friends, who affectionately dubbed themselves the “Dowagers,” we reminisced about our pasts. We were all seasoned in our own right, with rich histories in various professions, yet still young enough to embrace our dreams of writing. The camaraderie we shared transcended age; we laughed, swapped stories about family and career, and even indulged in a bit of gossip that made us feel youthful again.

As I reflected on that moment of being labeled “Ma’am,” I realized that the insecurities of my younger self still linger within me. I thought about the little girl who believed she could mend her parents’ conflicts by achieving perfection, or the ambitious young adult who grappled with self-doubt. Even now, as a mother, I find myself yearning for my parents’ validation and guidance, despite having carved my own path in life.

The Balance of Life

In the warmth of that Dowager gathering, we bonded over parenting, love, and the delicate balance between professional aspirations and family life. We shared laughs over movies like Magic Mike XXL, joking about how we want to shield our sons from certain messages about masculinity and respect. It was a reminder that, while we navigate the complexities of adulthood, those youthful joys and challenges remain an integral part of who we are.

Embracing the Journey

Ultimately, I’ve come to appreciate the blend of experiences that accompany aging. The years I’ve lived, the lessons learned, and the connections forged are all part of my journey. Accepting this tapestry of life—both the bright and the challenging—is perhaps the greatest gift of growing older.

So, as I face those moments of anxiety in the night, I find solace in the memories shared with the Dowagers, the laughter, and the understanding that we are all still learning and evolving together.

Resources for Aspiring Parents

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Conclusion

In summary, the experience of being called “Ma’am” served as a poignant reminder of how our perceptions of age evolve. Though I embrace the wisdom that comes with age, the echoes of my younger self still resonate within me, reminding me of the journey I’ve taken.