Last week marked a significant milestone for me: my eldest child began kindergarten, while my youngest started preschool. This swift transition hit me unexpectedly—not with tears over my little ones growing up, but rather with a sensation I’ve coined “Logistical Overwhelm.”
It all began when I received a stack of papers from the schools, filled with schedules that detailed days off and half days. I took it upon myself to meticulously record these dates in my beloved paper calendar (there’s something calming about writing things down by hand) before transferring them to my digital calendar for reminders. With calendars now displayed on our fridge and a snapshot sent to my partner, I felt a slight sense of accomplishment.
Next, I noted my older child’s after-school activities, confirming our babysitter’s regular hours and inquiring if she was available for extra shifts on short days or holidays. Following a friend’s suggestion, I scheduled medical appointments during holidays.
I calculated the time it would take to walk between schools, contemplated whether my younger child would nap better in a stroller or at school, and thought about enrolling him in extended care. I also made a note of which days they would be having lunch at school. I checked in with my partner about his work schedule, coordinating who would take the kids for flu shots and sending him all the dates via email. Finally, I attempted to organize my own week, ensuring I had prepared enough work in advance to cover for any unexpected “my child is sick” days.
And that was just week one! I began mapping out future weeks, locking in babysitter arrangements and delegating pick-ups to my partner whenever possible. After hours of organizing everything into three copies of the calendar, I exhaled—not in relief, but in a resigned acknowledgment that I was perhaps only partially prepared for the chaos ahead.
I can hear the suggestions now: “There’s an app for that!” or “You and your partner should use a shared Google calendar.” I’ll admit, I’m not the biggest fan of apps; they often make me feel like I’m at the mercy of my phone’s notifications, like a trained seal responding to every chime. I prefer to glance at my paper calendar at the start of the week and day, trusting my memory for what lies ahead.
Yet the details have become overwhelming: Which child needs lunch in the stroller, and which one wants pizza at school? Who has a music lesson right after school, and who can play a bit longer? The thought of managing this with additional children is daunting. A close friend with a demanding job and kids in different schools told me Logistical Overwhelm led her to stop at two kids: “If we had one more, I’d probably have to quit my job,” she confessed, as she juggles constant reminders and texts regarding her children’s whereabouts and last-minute surprises.
So, what’s the solution? Perhaps a third parent would help—a dedicated individual to manage household logistics. Unfortunately, polyamory isn’t my thing, so that’s not an option. For now, my iPhone plays the role of a backup parent, reminding me to schedule my own flu shot and prepare bags of permission slips the night before.
Logistical Overwhelm—my potential new band name or perhaps a condition I should discuss with a doctor. Just as soon as I note that appointment in my calendar.
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Summary:
Navigating the complexities of motherhood can lead to a phenomenon known as Logistical Overwhelm, especially during significant transitions like starting preschool or kindergarten. The detailed planning and coordination required to manage schedules, activities, and appointments can be daunting. While there are tools and resources available to help, the reality of juggling multiple responsibilities often leaves mothers feeling overwhelmed.