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First Birthday Party Theme: Surprise Bash!
by Lisa Thompson
Sep. 23, 2023
Despite knowing deep down that hosting a party for my daughter’s first birthday may not be the best idea, I simply cannot let this milestone pass without celebration. There will be cake (which is a health risk at best and a potential fire hazard at worst). There will be endless well-wishers eager to hold, hug, or annoy her in various ways. And, of course, there will be an abundance of alcohol—lots of it—because I’ve definitely earned the right to celebrate. Wait, I mean she’s earned it. Isn’t that what I meant to say?
After thorough research, I’ve discovered that the most successful first birthday parties are small, intimate gatherings held in familiar surroundings, ideally at a time that doesn’t disrupt a baby’s routine. This all sounds quite reasonable, but now is not the time for logic. First birthdays, much like New Year’s Eve, are occasions filled with hope and a dash of denial. So, I’m choosing to set aside all the sensible advice in favor of planning an extravagant celebration that’s bound to be chaotic.
If you’re also a parent enchanted by the idea of a grand first birthday bash, you might find my exhaustive planning helpful. After all, isn’t the essence of parenting all about investing excessive time in preparations, only to have your meticulous plans undone by your unpredictable child?
An Invitation to Our Little One’s Surprise First Birthday!
- Occasion: Baby’s 1st birthday
- Theme: Surprise Bash!
- Time: Between naps. Maybe from 1 PM to 4 PM? Or 3 PM to 6 PM? Perhaps even 3:30 PM to 6:30 PM, just to be cautious? Any later, and we might run into bedtime chaos. I might just text you 15 minutes before the party starts?
- Location: Let’s be real—I don’t want you in my home. Ever since our delightful little one arrived, our place has turned into a state of disarray that even the most optimistic real estate agent would struggle to sell. “It’s a fixer-upper with lots of potential,” I can already hear them say. Also, if the party turns out to be a flop, I want the freedom to leave. I’m likely to hold the festivities at a nearby café, restaurant, or even a bar.
Logistics
I’ll manage getting the birthday girl to the venue, perhaps under the guise of a new running route. She’ll be none the wiser! Just a heads-up: when we arrive, please refrain from shouting “Surprise!” This may frighten her and lead to tears (and likely a diaper emergency that has nothing to do with fear).
Guest List
Everyone’s invited! Bring your partners, friends, and whoever else you’d like—significant or otherwise. Kids will be allowed on a case-by-case basis, but I’d prefer to maintain a 15-to-1 adult-to-child ratio.
I’ve debated whether to invite my partner’s ex-spouse and have, in a moment of generosity, allowed her to join as an extra set of hands for the kiddos. I know, I can be quite magnanimous!
Gift Suggestions
Our daughter has developed a fondness for wine. It’s true! She loves to pull bottles off the rack (clearly takes after me). She seems to favor sauvignon blanc and dry riesling. Who knew?
Party Games
She enjoys playing “Hide-and-Seek with the TV Remote” and “Floor Food Scavenger Hunt.” We might even have a round of “Bang on the Computer Keyboard.” The first one to delete a vital document wins!
Important Reminder
If you happen to speak to our daughter over the next two weeks, please DO NOT mention the party—it would ruin the surprise. Also, if I bake a cake or acquire decorations, it might raise suspicion, so it’s better for someone else to handle those details.
Final Thoughts
Keep in mind that our little angel won’t remember this event. I suspect she won’t even enjoy it much. Ultimately, this is more of a chance for her father and me to pat ourselves on the back for surviving a year of parenting. One year in, and our little one shows no signs of emotional turmoil (aside from the occasional bed-wetting and mood swings). We’re doing great!
Thank you, and I hope to see you there!
For more insights on parenting and related topics, check out this blog post.
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Summary
A humorous take on planning a surprise birthday party for a toddler, filled with the chaos and excitement that comes with parenting, while also acknowledging that the event is more for the parents’ celebration than for the child.