You might recognize me or think you do. Perhaps you’ve spotted me at the playground—I’m the mom on the bench, engrossed in my phone while my little ones swing and climb. Or maybe you’ve seen me at the grocery store, scrolling through my screen as my kids tug at my sleeves for attention. I’m that mom who manages to juggle dinner orders at a restaurant with one hand while keeping an eye on the kids with the other. You probably label me as “that mom”—The One Who Can’t Put Down Her Phone When Spending Time with Her Kids.
You may wonder what kind of mother prioritizes her phone over her children. It’s easy to assume that I’m disengaged and too absorbed in my digital world to notice what my kids are doing or saying. But allow me to share a different perspective.
Finding Balance
When you see me at the park, that time is my breather. We homeschool, which means I’m actively engaged with my kids throughout the day, whether we’re learning, playing, or exploring. The park offers a rare opportunity where I know my kids are happily occupied, allowing me to catch up with friends or address some work-related tasks.
Ah, I forgot to mention my job! Alongside homeschooling, I work from home as a writer—a career I cherish that enables me to blend work and family life. This often means I need to proofread emails while my kids enjoy the playground, or respond to grocery store inquiries as they ask for snacks I’ve already denied. There are moments during my child’s karate class when inspiration strikes, prompting me to quickly jot down notes on my phone.
Staying Connected
But that’s just the beginning. Balancing homeschooling and working from home can make it tricky to carve out time for adult interactions. When you catch me on my phone, I might be reconnecting with old friends on Facebook, because nurturing relationships is vital for my well-being. I could be texting my partner, as my marriage is equally important. I might even be planning a visit to see my grandmother, who is 90 and whose time is precious. Or perhaps I’m sharing some laughs with my best friend through Bitmoji conversations, a delightful escape from the daily grind.
Organization and Planning
My phone also serves as a tool for organization. It’s not uncommon for me to use park time to look up tips on time management or to browse for quick, healthy dinner recipes while I shop. While dining out with my kids, I might be scheduling special one-on-one outings with each child, ensuring that despite our daily togetherness, we still carve out quality moments just for us.
On some days, I’m reviewing family finances, exploring places for field trips, or even indulging in a good book on my reading app—all while my kids are content. My phone essentially allows me to maintain my sanity while being present for my children. If I set a rule to never use my phone in their presence, I would lose the ability to balance this rewarding yet chaotic homeschooling and working life.
Understanding the Bigger Picture
So yes, you may have seen me and thought I was more interested in my phone than my kids. And, at times, I might have been. But you don’t know my full story, nor that of any other mom you see on her phone while her kids are nearby. Perhaps she just spent hours fully engaged with them. Maybe she’s fulfilling work obligations that allow her to stay home. Or perhaps she’s simply practicing self-care in a world that often overlooks its importance. I’m sure I’m not alone in this experience.
So the next time you see me on my phone, don’t worry or judge my parenting skills. I’m not an inattentive mom, and my kids aren’t lacking in attention. They benefit from these phone breaks just as much as I do.
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In Summary
The image of a mom on her phone can be misleading. There’s often much more happening behind the scenes—balancing work, family, and personal connections—all while nurturing the next generation.