As I sat in church, I observed a family in front of me: a mother, a father, and their adult daughter. The mother wrapped her arm around her daughter, who leaned her head on her mother’s shoulder. In that moment, I glanced down at my 5-year-old, who was peacefully resting his head in my lap. A profound realization struck me: no matter how grown they become, our children will always be our little ones, for through the eyes of a parent, their baby selves remain visible.
Reflections on My Son
Take my 11-year-old son, for instance. His appearance has changed significantly—his adult teeth are in, his hair has darkened and thickened, and he stands almost as tall as my chin now. Yet, when I focus, I can still see the tiny scar on his cheek, a remnant from his infancy that I often pondered over while nursing. I remember his gap-toothed grin at age 6 when he was so proud of his Lego masterpiece. Even in his long, elegant fingers, I can trace back to the pudgy hands of a little boy who used to push toy cars across the floor. He remains my baby because I still see that child in him.
Memories of My Daughters
Looking at my daughters, their long hair flowing, I can almost visualize the messy curls that used to stick to their foreheads after a nap. I hear echoes of their little voices, singing “You Are My Sunshine” with adorable mispronunciations at the age of 2. Those sweet, high-pitched notes have transformed into beautiful harmonies that now take my breath away. They are still my babies, and I cherish that I can see their younger selves in them.
The Evolution of Hugs
Their hugs feel different now that they can wrap their arms around my neck while standing beside me. Yet, when I close my eyes, I can still remember the warm embraces of their chubby arms as they rested their tiny heads on my shoulder. Though they are nearly grown, they still ask for a “kid sandwich”—a hug with me on one side, them in the middle, and dad on the other. No one needs to lift them for these hugs anymore; they stand tall on their own, yet in those moments, my babies return to me.
Watching My Youngest Grow
My 5-year-old is stretching out beneath his sheets, his legs growing longer and stronger. His feet resemble those of a little boy rather than a baby. He’s losing his baby roundness, and when he runs, it’s only slightly amusing. I watch him and realize that soon he will be as tall as his siblings, and then taller than me. I wonder if, when he’s older—shaving and with a deep voice—I’ll still be able to see my baby within him.
Shifting Roles
Because I can recognize my little ones in each of them, I find myself wanting to hold them close, sometimes even more than they desire. Just this morning, I reminded my son about the coat I worry he might need for the bus stop. After all, I spent his early years swaddling him and ensuring he was warm and safe. As he looked at me with what felt like pity, he assured me he was fine without it. For a brief moment, I wondered if he meant he didn’t need me. But then I remembered that my baby is still there; he simply needs me in different ways now.
Now, my role has shifted from swaddling and tucking them in to helping with homework, discussing challenges, driving them to sports practice, and assisting with school play preparations. Each of these moments brings its own sweetness, distinct from earlier years but just as precious. While we are growing in new directions, I realize we are not discarding the past; we are building on it. When the right moment arises, they become my little ones again, if only for a fleeting instant. What a beautiful gift to know that the babies I adored are still a part of them.
Embracing the Present
I hug them closely whenever I can, cherishing the moments they allow me to nurture the little ones still within them. I stand tall, take a deep breath, and embrace them as they are now. I celebrate their independence and strength, fully aware that this is the essence of motherhood. We are preparing our little ones—and ourselves—for the adults they will eventually become. I gaze at my beloved children in awe, appreciating how my love for them continues to evolve. No matter what the future holds, they will always be my babies.
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In summary, the love we have for our children evolves as they grow, allowing us to see the essence of their baby selves within their adult personas. Cherishing those moments and recognizing the layers of our parenting journey enriches our experience as mothers.